Emotionally Difficult

When I decided to major in Marriage and Family studies, I didn't think about how it could affect me personally. I only tough about the help I could give others. I'm not sure what kind of classes I though I would take, but I did not realize I would take classes that would bring up emotional issues I have yet to work on. 

At the beginning, I took a class called Family Relations. This was hard because it pointed out exactly how toxic my first marriage was. I learned from the texted book methods of abuse I didn't know existed as I realized that was how I was treated. I had to come to terms with that. As I worked through those emotions, I became more aware of how lucky I was to find Chad when I did. 

A few years ago, I took a parenting class. There was a project in which I was supposed to interview my parents or grandparents as well as a sibling. The week before this was assigned, my grandfather, my last grandparent on this earth, passed away. That meant that I would not be able to acquire two interviews between my parents and grandparents. It highlighted the fact that all of my grandparents and one of my parents were gone. I had no problem interviewing my sister and my dad, but I had to think outside the box and get special permission for the final interview. I was able to get the permission to interview my mother-in-law. 

This semester, I am taking Family Stress and Coping. Every week I read several exerts from various books to learn about ways of coping and models that can be followed when dealing with stress. There have been assignments asking how the readings relate to our family of origin or creation. Most of the time, I sit thinking about how I wish we had these tools growing up or that I had known about them when my children were younger. I worry that I haven't taught my kids the right way to cope with everyday stress as well as the big stressors of life. 

There have been other classes that have been hard, but these are the three that have affected me the most so far. I am sure there will be more.