Phone Call From My Kids

                                    
My kids go to their dad's the first 3 weekends of the month. They often complain that they didn't really do anything on Saturday and were bored. Since my oldest has a cell phone, I remind them that it is perfectly ok to call me since I rarely work on Saturdays anymore.
Yesterday, the oldest child decided to do just that. I had a great conversation with him about the books that he likes to read and the dinner that they had with their dad the night before. (Did you know Macaroni Grill has pepperoni bigger pepperoni on their pizza than Subway has on their sandwiches?) After about 30 minutes of talking to my oldest child, the other kids realized who he was talking to and wanted to talk, too. I, then, was able to talk to them for a while about what they had been doing that morning and the books they enjoyed reading and other things that they wanted to talk about.
By the time I got off the phone, I had been on the phone for about 45 minutes, but it didn't feel like more than 5 or 10 minutes. I am so glad that my oldest decided to call me and the others wanted to talk to me as well. It is amazing how those sweet children can brighten a day where I was sucked in by current events. I am truly blessed to be their mom.

Christmas Books

To bring the spirit of Christmas into my home this year, I am using my story time with the kids to read Christmas stories. So far I have read one chapter book (a chapter per night) and two other stories. The chapter book we read was AWESOME! The final chapter had me teary eyed and brought a beautiful spirit into the home. This book was The Best Christmas Pageant Ever. We got it as a family gift years ago, but I had never read it completely. I saw the movie years ago, but didn't really remember it other than the goofy stuff in it. I am so glad that I found it while cleaning and decided to share it with my kids. I hope to be able to find more books that can bring the same spirit through out the month.

An Early Christmas

I have to share my kids. It is not the best or most fun way to live, but it is the reality of no longer being married to my kids' father. This year is his turn to have the kids on Christmas. A reality that...well...sucks. I told the kids that they were getting to spend Thanksgiving at home this year because they were going to be with Daddy for Christmas quite a while ago.
Last weekend the reality of them not being here on Christmas day hit me and made me start thinking of ways to still make the season special as well as trying to figure out when we were going to be able to celebrate Christmas (working in the service industry means that I have to work Christmas Eve). After talking it over with my husband, we agreed that December 23rd would work best. It is a Sunday meaning neither of us has to work, and we will be going to church and being filled with Christmas messages (a great way to remind the kids what Christmas is really about).
I explained this to the kids a few nights ago and suggested that Eric write a letter to Santa to request that he make one exception this year and stop by 2 nights early. My poor sweet Eric had tear welling up in his eyes. He was fine with writing the letter and even left room for his brother and sister to sign. As I looked it over and told him what a great job he did, he started crying. I asked him what was wrong, and he told me that he didn't want to go anywhere for Christmas. He just wanted to be home. This melted my heart. I looked into my sweet 10-year-old's face and told him that could understand that, but his daddy loves him too and it is his turn. I don't know if it really made him feel any better. It is moments like that thought that I just want to say, "Then you can stay home if that is what you want." I can't. I have to share. Being a grown-up is hard sometimes.

Proud Mama Moments

This was in Sean's Friday Folder this last week. He did a great job!

Noel excitedly shared this with me today. Now I have proof that she knows how to read (she tries to convince me otherwise).

Eric brought these home in his Friday Folder.

Martin's Cove Trip

For Labor Day, we decided to take a day trip up to Martin's Cove. (FYI it is not really "day trip" distance. I would suggest planning to spend at least one night up there to get anything out of it.) We also decided to stop at a couple other little historical stops on the way. We all had a lot of fun!

Our first stop was the Lincoln Highway Monument. It was at the Welcome Center as we were driving into Wyoming. Eric read all of the signs (of course). He even read the displays in the Welcome Center. It was a nice little stop (and it had some of the cleanest bathrooms for the whole trip). It was definitely a good place to get out and stretch. 

If you look really close, the kids are in this picture.

We traveled for a ways longer and longer and...well...we took an unintentional 2 hour detour. (Did you know there is more than one HWY 287 in Wyoming?) We did get back on track and stopped at our next stop, Fort Steele. It is just a little place just off of the highway and almost in ruins. The kids liked it, and there were signs that pointed to where things used to be and were the stuff that were still standing were. Again, Eric read every sign and really took in the information.

Then we went on to Martin's Cove. It was great! We pulled and rode in hand carts. Then we went through the visitors center and learned about pioneer life, followed by going through the museum buildings to learn more about the Mormon pioneers as well as the Sun family that owned the ranch the museum was now at. 

The last historical stop was at Fort Casper. We got there 20 minutes after it closed so we couldn't go into the museum, but we did get some pictures from the parking lot and played on the playground before our journey home. 

Does anyone know what this is? We didn't, but Sean took a lot of pictures of it.

We all had a great time. The kids are already talking about what they want to do when we go next year!

The Secret's Out

I am going to preface this by saying: if you want to comment, I don't want advise on how to solve the problem. I am just frustrated.

I potty trained all of my kids when they were about 2 and a half. That means that for the oldest it has been about 8 years, the middle about six, and the youngest about 4. One would think that by now they would all be over having "accidents." That one would be thinking wrong. I have only one child that seems to have mastered the concept of using the toilet every time they need to go. That would be my middle child. The one that most people think would act out the most to get attention. (He does have his moments, but not in this area thank goodness.)
My oldest is in 5th grade. He doesn't have any mental disorders. He is extremely smart. He had an "accident" so bad at school today that they had to not only give him pants to wear, but a shirt as well. Somehow it doesn't bother him or embarrass him to pee in his pants at school. In fact, school is the only place that he does this. I make him do a load of laundry each time. That doesn't seem to help (the darn kid likes doing laundry). Today is the beginning of the second week of school, and it is the second day my kid has needed a change of clothes. Last week they called me and asked me to bring him clothes. I got irritated and once again (like I have been doing the last few years when the same person has called me to bring him clothes) told the them that I have to be at work. I can't just drop everything to bring this child who more than knows better a change of clothes. I offered to send clothes for him to drop off at the nurses office like they suggested in years past. This time they didn't think it was a good idea. My next step is to do what this child thinks is incredibly embarrassing and send him to school every day with a plastic bag of clothes to change into "just in case" for him to carry in his backpack every day for a month. If he has to use them the month starts all over. I am at my whits end with this. He doesn't have this problem at home. The school always suggests I get him tested for bladder problems. I really don't think that is it. If that was it wouldn't he have the problem over the summer. He didn't have one single "accident" all summer that I know of. Not when he was with me or the babysitter anyway.
 My youngest child lately thinks that not only is it ok to "just go a little" in her pants, she doesn't seem to understand that by continuing to wear the pants, she can get infections. I wish that was the worst of it. Last week, while in the shower, she went number two, left the shower on, and when I went in to ready the shower for her brother, she said it was the dog. Strange how it wasn't there when she got it, the door was closed while she was in and as soon as she got out, and there was a stinky pile of yuck that definitely didn't smell like the dogs' messes in there the next time I opened the door. I had to turn off the shower, quickly clean it, and try to think of some kind of discipline for something I never thought a child would do. She did a load of laundry (I was too taken back to think of anything else).
Tonight, when my oldest went to brush his teeth, my oldest found a human surprise on the bathroom floor. REALLY? How can someone get that close and just go on the floor instead of the potty. I tried to get the culprit to clean it up, but she wouldn't admit to it. (Apparently, she not only has a bathroom problem, she has a truth telling problem.) Since it was a bit past bed time, I just cleaned it up myself this time. UGH!
My solution for now it to have the two that don't know how to use the bathroom do yet one more load of laundry each tomorrow and assist each other in cleaning this room that one doesn't seem to know how to find and the other doesn't seem to know where to go in it.
I keep trying to remind myself that they are just children and it is my job to teach them how to be successful. I can say I am doing a good job in most areas. I just need to get this thing nipped in the bud before go insane!

Things I Never Thought I Would Say

"Yes, Eric, you can make your bed instead of playing if you want."

"Have fun organizing your dresser, Princess."

I think aliens have taken the place of two of my children...

Tomatoes

We have a tomato plant in the front yard that is getting quite big. It has yet to produce any tomatoes, but there are a lot of flowers on it. Yesterday, when getting out of the car, Noel says, "Hey, Mom! Look! We have LOTS of tomatoes on this plant!" I asked her where because I wasn't seeing what she was seeing. She points to a group of flowers and says, "Right there. At least they will be..."

Moving Things Around

I have decided to move things around a bit. I realized that my blog that started off to be about my family life was getting to be more and more about my struggle with goals (mostly weight loss). I have decided to split it up a bit. I will now have a blog for my family journal and one for my personal goals. I am really hoping that this will help motivate me to achieve my goals. Come see Druciana's YoYo when you get the chance!

Olympics With the Kids

I am so happy that I can watch the Olympics with the kids this summer. The boys love the swimming. Noel loves gymnastics. I like both (works well for me). I swell with pride as I hear my children chant, "USA, USA, USA, USA," as I am making dinner in the next room. I find it fun that my daughter doesn't really care what team "the girl with the eyeshadow" is on, she just cares that she is wearing make up. I like being able to talk to Eric about his memories of watching 4 years ago. It is fun to remember my brother, sister, and I watching as kids and trying to reenact what we were watching all over the family room. Heck. I just love the Olympics!

Being Myself

I admire people who are completely comfortable being themselves no matter what. I am good with being myself at home. My husband is my best friend. He knows more of my secrets than anyone. I can be myself with my sister and my really close friends. However, it has gotten to a point on facebook that I am not sure I can be myself. I have about 200 "friends" on facebook. I enjoy keeping my contacts with people from the past. I am glad I have a way to keep in touch with people I have worked with recently (for the most part). I am so worried about offending people that I barely know that I don't think I can voice my opinion on there. So here we go. If you decide that my views are offensive. If you take me off of your friends list on facebook. So be it. I need a place to be me. I have already removed some, and depending on who you are may not even notice if you get rid of me.
Here gos nothing:
I am a Mormon. I believe in the teachings that I have been taught though out my life. I take my kids to church every Sunday.I believe that by taking my children to church and teaching them about God and Jesus Christ. I get offended when people speak ill of my religion. If I didn't believe in the teachings of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, I would not still be going.
I don't believe in gay marriage. I am not completely anti-homosexual, I just believe that marriage is to be between a man and a woman. I don't believe in ostracizing anyone who feels differently than I. Everyone is meant to be happy and is entitled to their own opinions. I have personal reasons my vies that I will not share in a public venue.
I am completely monogamous. I have know the pain of being cheated on. I wouldn't wish that kind of pain on my worst enemy. When I hear people that are in committed relationship talk about the people they have on the side and how they are hiding it from the person they supposedly love, it sickens me. If it would just kill you for them to leave, do betray them in the worst way possible.
My kids are my world. I would do anything for them. I do have to work to try to support them. That does not mean that I don't love my kids. If I had the option, I would stay home with them. I just don't have that option right now.
As someone who has lived as a single parent for a little while, I respect people who have to raise their children alone. Luckily, I still had my kids' dad in their lives. I also had a great support system (I have the best sister and friends a girl could ask for). I couldn't imagine doing it completely by myself.
I have been divorced. Sometimes it is the right decision. I didn't marry my first husband to get divorced. I didn't just give up when it got a bit tough. It was not the easy way out by any means. It was a decision that affected many people. The purpose of the divorce was not to harm others, it was to try to stop a bad situation from becoming worse.
I am not against guns. I really don't think about them much. You won't catch me protesting either way.
I know bad things happen. I believe that the world is a scarier place than it was when I was a kids. I try to protect my kids as much as possible.However,  I don't want to live my life in fear. I live in a small, safe town. I want my kids to feel safe. I will let them play outside without telling them a bunch of scary stories about kids that have been kidnapped or killed.
I am a hard worker. I am finally being recognized for my efforts at my job. I will not apologize for being picked to do a project based on my skills and stats. I will not apologize for taking vacation time that I have earned. I will continue to work hard. I would like to be able to socialize at work, but if people are going to hate me and not talk to me because I have earned a few (very few) privileges, they can go ahead and do so.
I am lucky to be married to a man who truly loves me and my children. He listens to my craziness. He lets me cry when I am overwhelmed with life. He values my opinion. I used to wish to have the kind of marriage that my friends had where I would feel valued as a person. I finally have that. I really do love that man!

Tuesday

Imagine this...You are running a little late for work. The kids are now, finally, loaded in the car. You are still telling them not to touch each other  or speak to each other if they can't be nice. You put the car into reverse to get out of the driveway. You need to stop the car to put it into drive and it doesn't stop. You think, "I know the breaks have been a bit soft lately, but this is crazy. Maybe since I am wearing heals, I am just not pushing the break right." You go on to the first stop sign and realize it is not your heals, you are not stopping here either.

This is exactly what happened to me two days ago. Luckily I live in a small town and no one is taking there kids to school to make the street busy. I was able to safely go around the block, get back home, and put the car into park to stop the car on the driveway (yes, I know this is bad for the transmission, but I had 3 kids in the car and needed to stop it). I made the the kids get into my husband's car and asked him to take the kids to the sitter so that I could get the car figured out. I made some calls, moved around as much money as I could, and arranged for a tow truck to pick me up (I figured that I shouldn't drive until I could safely stop). Then, I decided that since I mooched off of so many people while I was single, I would just walk home. Besides, it was only about a 10 minute drive. It couldn't be that bad of a walk, right? Wrong. I learned that a 4 mile drive may only be 10 minutes, but a 4 mile walk takes me about 2 hours. To make matters worse, I live in a very small town. Most of my walk was on a road that has practically nothing on it. The only business between home and the shop we took the car is Family Dollar. On a day that topped out at 97, that is not great. I was so thirsty. I stopped at Family Dollar to just get a drink. I ended up getting some jelly beans as well. As I crossed a small bridge where there was no where else to walk other than in the road, I walked as far over as I could . A little old lady driving an SUV called me an idiot as she passed by. I can just about guarantee that if I just randomly decided to go for a candy/soda run, I would have gone to the Shell station where I could walk on sidewalks. 

This is how I ended my vacation from work. I of course had to call in since I live in the boondocks, there is no mass transit.

We Thought It Was Funny

Chad and I went on our honeymoon this weekend thanks to his parents who gave us a night in Estes Park. We had a blast! One thing that we do quite often is joke around and make fun of each other. Since I have been married before and no matter where we go, people seem to like to point it out, and of all nights to choose to try to start a fight my ex chose that night, our jokes this weekend kind of had a "my next spouse" theme. He would say, "My next wife will be nice to me." I would say, "My fifth husband (yes that is 3 more in the future) will be what I am really looking for." It would soften the mood when we got lost looking for specific places like...how to get out of the parking lot at the Stanley Hotel or the restaurant back in the mountains further than we thought it was. On our way home, we stopped by Chad's parent's house to thank them for the enjoyable and beautiful trip. He tells them about his "my next wife" joke. They thought it was funny. After all, as they pointed out, it took him 38 years to get married the first time. We then, laughingly, told them about my "fifth husband" joke. Chad and I laughed and pointed out that since I was able to find my second husband less than a year after my divorce, it was possible. They looked at me like I was an alien. It was like they were thinking that it really wasn't a funny joke coming from me. Trust me, it is a hilarious joke! On the way home, I laughed about their reaction, and he didn't seem to get why I was laughing. This morning, Chad was laughing about it (I don't think that he realized their reaction until he had gotten some sleep). I love my husband!

I Need to Figure This Out

I hate how hard weight loss is. I hate how much time it takes to log what I eat. I hate that I need to exercise to not gain any weight. I am just so frustrated! I am scared to weigh myself because I know by how round my face is getting and how horribly clothes are fitting. I popped a button off of some pants this morning that fit well enough a month ago. Two days ago I was picking up some of the stuff the puppy chewed and left on the floor, I realized how hard it was for me to bend down and pick things up. I haven't had those kind of problems since I was pregnant. I'm not pregnant this time. There is only one conclusion I can draw. I am just getting fatter and fatter. I need to get this figured out.

Eric and Sean Go Fishing

My sister and brother-in-law took my boys camping and fishing this last week. During this camping trip, they taught them how to fish. Their first fishing trip was a success. Sean caught 5 fish, and Eric caught 3. (I think I have only caught 1 fish in my whole life.) Since my sister is so awesome,  she took pictures and shared them with me.

Aren't they just the cutest little fishermen ever?

New Honor

A new escalations team was started at my job this week. The people picked for this team are  said to be the best of the project in the center. Most agents were chosen by their supervisors in some way. I was picked not only by my supervisor, I was picked by the person heading up the team as well. On top of the honor of being the only person so for that was hand picked the way that I was, there were only three people that were chosen to do administration work (a.k.a. I get to be off the phone most of the time). There are definitely downsides to being on this team, but as someone who would rather move up in the company that I work for than look for a new job, it is a step in the right direction. I'm not saying that I will always be working at the same place (I would love to get out of the call center realm eventually), but I would like the experience of working higher up in the company. In fact, if they treat me right, I would like to stay with the same company at least until I complete my associates degree.

Random Thoughts About My Kids

My kids are wonderful. They are the most loving people that I know. Sometimes I just look at them in awe of the fact that I am blessed with being their mother. They are growing up so fast that it scares me.

My oldest is 10 and a half. I have a hard time letting him grow up sometimes. I wants him to feel comfortable asking me or talking to me about anything. The questions and comments he comes up with lately are more and more grown up. The thought that it may be time to start talking to him about subjects that I have been shying away from has been coming into my head more and more lately. I want to keep him innocent as long as possible, but I know it is not always possible. He is growing and maturing in front of my eyes. At what age should I talk to him about things like sex and drugs? Even though I know these things aren't a part of his life yet, is it too late for these kind of talks or is he still too young and innocent to worry about it?
My middle child is going to be 9 in a few months (where does the time go). He is so much like me it is scary. He is a people pleaser.  Even though he says he doesn't like school, I know that he likes all of the praise and attention he gets. He can still be difficult if there is something that he wants though (he isn't a robot after all). He loves video games. By this, I mean that when he doesn't get to play video games, he acts like he days was ruined. I have been trying to keep him away from video games as much as possible for this reason. In fact, he hasn't played video games in quite a while. The thing is that even though he doesn't get to play on a regular basis, when he does get to play, he acts like he is entitled to play them every day and pouts when we tell him no. I hope that by me telling him no, that he is learning more things that are fun do. I know he is liking riding his bike and building with Legos more lately. I just need to get a new inner tube for his bike again. Maybe that will help.

My baby is 6 and a half. I just can't believe she is that big already. Sometimes I wonder who said she was allowed to grow up. When I ask her, she says, "Heavenly Father." Who could argue with that? She is so girly it is fun. At the same time, she is my most rough and tumble kid. She is the most likely of the three to be walking around with scrapes and bruises from playing outside. Half the time, she doesn't even tell me when she gets hurt anymore, and if I ask her where the bruise/scrape came from she doesn't even know (her brothers bring attention to every paper cut they get). She loves Fancy Nancy, pink, and wearing dresses. She is picky about what she wears. Her drawers can be over flowing with clean clothes, but she will be upset that she has nothing "pretty" to wear. I'm sure it will get worse as she gets older, and I don't think there is a way around it.

I wouldn't trade my kids for the world. All I ever wanted to be was a mommy, and thanks to these precious babies, I get to live that dream. I am so glad that I was blessed with being their mom. I feel guilty for not being able to give them everything, but I know that I give them the best I have. I still get up with them when they have bad dreams. I cook dinner for them most nights. I make breakfast for them every morning (even if it is just pouring them cereal most of the time). I do my best to find good babysitters that treat them like the special people that they are. I worry about them growing up to be responsible, respectable, caring adults. I take my job as a mom VERY seriously!

Procrastination at Its Best...or Maybe Worst

It is week 12 of my term. The last week. This is both good and bad. Good because I will get a week or two before the next term starts. Bad because I have procrastinated way too much this terms. My environmental science teacher said at the beginning of the term that all class discussions needed to be completed on time (by midnight Saturday each week) all other work can be turned in at any time for full credit. I should not have read this message. I took this as I can just wait until the end to complete anything I was to tired to get done on Saturday (if it is due on Saturday, I do it on Saturday). I got 2 assignments in today since I am home alone and off work. I still have 3 more assignments to do plus the quiz and class discussion for this week. Ugh! It's a good thing that my business communications teacher wasn't as lenient.

My Cute Girl

 While with their dad this weekend, my kids watched Transformers. Surprisingly, it sounds like my daughter liked the movie. During the drive home Sunday night, she all of a sudden yells out in excitement, "A real Optimus! Mom, there is a REAL Optimus behind us!" Before we got home she saw at least 2 more drive down the other side of the highway. Her excitement was adorable!

Need. To. Lose. Weight.

Ok. So I need to work harder at this losing weight thing. I think I may have gained back all of the weight that I lost since the wedding plus some. That is not good news for a girl that barely fit into her wedding dress in February and has to fit into it again in less than a month. Every time I make a goal that would help, I get lazy or do things like earn a gift card to McDonald's at work. I didn't do well at five minutes of exercise a day this week. I kept telling myself that I could do it later because, after all, it was only five minutes. Before I knew it, I was too exhausted to do even the five minutes. I swore I wouldn't drink anymore soda. Then they started giving out 5.00 gift cards at work for good customer satisfaction surveys (they are a lot easier to get when not working retention). Of course the doughnut fascination (see below) that I have had doesn't help. Ugh! I am so weak. I have been thinking about my habits lately. I think I need to use exercise as my "therapy" like I did both times I was separated from Mr. Wrong. I was losing weight and feeling good about it. I don't know why I stopped. My hubby is willing to work out with me or at least keep me company when I would out. He encourages me as much as possible. When it comes to eating, I have never had good eating habits for more than a month or two. Well right now, I only need to do it for a month. Hmm. I need ideas, good ones that I can do to lose at least 10 pounds by June 23.

Time to Make the Doughnuts

When Chad and I got married, we registered at Target for a lot of fun stuff and stuff to decorate our home that I have always wanted. (We weren't really in need of a lot because we were combining two established homes. In fact we had so much of the basics that we had a yard sale last month that went pretty well.) A big part of what we registered for was kitchen gadgets (I LOVE kitchen gadgets!) My favorite one by far that we have received is the doughnut maker. It looks like a Homer Simpson doughnut (who wouldn't want that in their home?) When we first started using it, I was using the recipes that it came with. One day my husband came up with a great idea, using muffin mixes instead. It works great. I can have fun making doughnuts, the kids get to have doughnuts more often, and everyone is happy. I don't remember who gave this wonderful toy to me...I mean us, but I love it!

4 Day Weekend

I am so excited that I have a 4 day weekend this weekend. I was scheduled off today, tomorrow I am taking a paid day off, and I was scheduled the next 2 days off. I am so glad, and I so need it. I, also, get to spend all 4 days with my kids (added bonus). We aren't doing anything hugely exciting just spending time together. The only thing that would make it better would be if Chad had all 4 days off as well.

A Bit of Motivation

In case you haven't noticed, I have been having a hard time accomplishing my goals. I think that I just need to have more motivation. When explaining this to my sweet husband and telling him that the last time I was really motivated to get moving was a few years ago when I was in a goal competition with some friends. He thought that competition sounded like fun, so we are going to have a friendly competition between the two of us. Whoever can drink at least 4 cups of water, do at least 30 minutes of homework, exercises for at least 5 minutes, and do our one daily chore each day. We both know that we have no reason for not getting at least these things done each day, but they just are not happening. Whoever completes the tasks the most wins. The loser has to clean the bathroom. I am determined to not lose. I HATE cleaning the bathroom!

UGH! This Teacher!

There has been something about Eric's teacher that has bothered me for quite some time. The problem is she doesn't seem to know how to tell the truth, and she is really good at cutting me down and making me feel like I don't do enough for my child. (Didn't I get divorced from someone who treated me that way?)
At parent/teacher conferences she acts like there are no problems at all, and then a few weeks later asks to meet with me to discuss the fact that Eric has many missing assignments that were supposed to be done in class. I have had a few before or after school meetings with her (mostly after school because she flags me down as I am picking up my kids on my days off). The solution has always been that I need to bring him in early (which is hard to do because that means getting all of my kids ready a half hour early) or for him to stay late (which she has actually only done once or twice).
Last October, he was sent home with a stack of papers so large that needed to be finished that I could see how he may be overwhelmed. Heck, I was more than overwhelmed just looking at it and trying to figure out how I was going to get him through all of it. I did his homework packet with him and a few more worksheets each night.
Back in November she had the nerve to tell me that she understood I was going to school for myself but I needed to think of my kids right now. At the time, I was in training and having to work a very late shift for that training class, depend on my ex-husband and boyfriend (now my husband) and a few wonderful friends for childcare, live on very little sleep to make sure that my kids still got to school on time everyday, and try to fit in time to do school work (I got F's in both classes that term). Eric has rarely had problems getting his actual home work done, but his classwork has been a different story.  When his dad started helping with nighttime childcare, I made sure that Eric had what I felt to be a reasonable amount of worksheets to do in his backpack everyday.
At the end of the first semester, Eric made the honor roll. Instead of praising him for the effort he did put in, his teacher pulled him aside and told him that if he had actually tried, he would have made the Superintendent's list (that in and of itself caused problems this semester). By this time, I was working my regular shift. (I don't like the shift because it is a closing shift, but that is not the point to this rant.) I now had a bit more time with my kids. I get up with them in the morning, get them ready, and take them to school. I get home at about 8:30 which gives me about a half hour to do homework with them, get them ready for bed, and read to them before they go to sleep (see why I don't like the shift). I have about an hour and a half to two hours with my kids most days (it kills my heart, and hopefully will change soon).
The teacher started sending home five to ten pages of worksheets on top of the two that have to be done for homework each night. My babysitter won't do homework with the kids. My husband does his best. That really leaves me to get all of that done with him and make sure the before school or bed routines are done and make sure the other kids don't feel neglected in the process. Eric is a smart kid. When he knows his stuff and feels motivated, he can get it done quickly, but not that quickly. If the motivation isn't there, forget about getting anything done.
About two weeks ago, Eric's teacher flagged me down after school, like she has done several times before. She said that Eric has not been turning in anything that she has been sending home. I explained that we have been getting an additional two or three papers done each night to go with his homework pack. She pointed out that he had one past due homework pack (it had one or two pages not completed and it was already determined that he was behind on it because I was told that he didn't have one for a few weeks which was not really true). Then she jumped all over me about the one that was due that Friday (it was a Tuesday and he had the Monday night work done already) saying that not enough had been done in it yet. She pulled two papers out of his backpack that had not been completed that day in class and said something to the effect of me not making sure it would be done for another month (yes, I said IN CLASS). I looked and her and said that I was confused as to how she expected me to get him to do the work in my two hours a day I had with him if she, a professional, couldn't get him to do it in the seven hours she had him. She then turned the to a place that it should have not gone. She asked me if I would consider retention. I immediately told her know. He is too smart, doesn't need it, and would be bored out of his mind if he had to stay in the forth grade. She said that she didn't feel that he was mature enough to continue on and that he would struggle even more next year with getting his assignments turned in on time. I completely agree that he is a bit immature for his age, but I don't think at this stage in the game it is a reason to retain my child. She also said he just wasn't organized enough an asked is there were problems at home. Well, of course there are some problems at home for him. He is a ten year old little boy whose parents were divorced last year, and this year his mom got married to someone else. It is difficult for any kid. Heck, it was hard for me and I was older than he is. She suggested maybe he needed to be medicated. Um...NO! She told me that two or three worksheets per night were not enough and that she was going to send home at least seven per night that she expected to be done the next day and asked if it was ok for Eric to stay after school on Mondays for about a half hour. The babysitter said that she didn't mind so I said that was fine.
About a week later a friend was watching the kids for me and her son helped Eric complete about TEN pages of homework which was only half of it. That was the day that Eric's dad started his concern about Eric getting his work done. I talked to him an told him what was going on. We agreed that I would call and make an appointment with the principal. My next week day off was today, so we scheduled it for this morning at 9:35.
The meeting was mostly about how to get Eric to show that he knows his stuff without making him do all of the worksheets since his test scores are showing that he knows what he is doing. The thing is that we are so close to the end of the school year that there are only a few days even left of classwork before the grades get turned in. The teacher kind of agreed to back off on the worksheets. The principal and I also decided that we will have a meeting a the beginning of next school year with whatever teach he has to make sure she understands that Eric needs other ways to show he knows what he is doing without all of the busy work that he refuses to do anyway. When the principal asked if I felt that my concerns were address I explained that I didn't feel the threats of retention were addressed. He explained that if retention was a consideration, we would have started talking about it in December, not now. I explained how she had talked to me. She denied it. She said that she was sorry if that was the impression that I or Eric got from recent conversations. I again went over the basics of the conversation, and said that I am concerned if she is talking to me that way how is she talking to my kid. I don't want him in forth grade to think that he is a failure and not accomplishing anything. I don't feel that is the a good foundation for the future. I want him to be more successful in life than I have been. I don't want him to drop out of school or wait until his is in his 30's to go to college. I have tried very hard to make sure that he knows he is extremely smart for his age for as long as I can remember. All she could do was say she was sorry about the impression that she gave me and lie about the rest. Over all I think I got somewhere with the principal but no where with the lying teacher.
 I will continue doing what I am doing as a mom. I do my best. I work so they can have food and clothes and be able to go to the doctor when they are sick. I read a chapter of a book to them every night that I have them. I snuggle them when they are feeling lonely or sad. I wash their scraps and give them ice for their bumps. I make their lunches almost every morning. I put together a dinner for my husband to make them when I can. I am a mom. I live for my kids, and refuse to let ANYONE make me feel otherwise!

A Game Plan

I am sick of being broke (I believe my husband is too). We are going to set a game plan. Our first step has already started. We borrowed Dave Ramsey's Financial Peace University from some good friends. And we have started listing to the lessons and taking notes. I think after the struggles that we have both gone through before we got married and in the last few months since we got married have made as angry enough to take action. I am determined to never go into debt again. Getting collection calls all day every day sucks. Worrying about losing the house sucks. Trying to explain to the kids that we can't go out to eat any more sucks. I have listened to his pod-casts in the past but didn't have the drive or determination to set a budget and stick to it. I am declaring right here, right now, I will make it though to the other end of this struggle with my husband and be happier in the end. We will win!

Goal Update

I had four goals for this last week. I did a good job this week. FINALLY!

My first goal was to walk the dogs at least 3 times. Chad and I went on two walks with the dogs and walked Jasper when picking Noel up from school the day after my last blog. I know that I can't attribute any weight loss to a few walks, but I am getting out and moving. Hopefully, I will be able to find the time to exercise soon, but for now walking the dogs is better than nothing.

My second goal was to my assignments Monday. I started reading one chapter for one class on Monday. I struggled to find time to read all week, and I was still up late finishing my assignments. I am going to have to revisit this area so that I am not struggling on Saturday night to get my assignments done and turned in by midnight.

My third goal was to read the scriptures to my kids every night. I am happy to say that I only missed one night that I had them (they go to their dad's  most Friday and Saturday nights). I am really hoping that the kids are getting something out of it other than it is cool when Nephi cuts of Laban's head. Either way, I am doing what I feel I need to do to teach my children the gospel.

My forth and final goal was to get at least one more show booked. I honestly didn't get this one done. I am having a hard time getting the courage up to call people and ask them if they want to host a show.

My goal for this week:

1. Walk the dogs 4 times
2. Read a chapter a day until they are all read
3. I will continue to read scriptures each night
4. I will make at least one contact a day for Pampered Chef

I know that I can accomplish these goals!

Yard Sale

Ok. I don't do this a lot, but I feel the need to advertise the yard sale my sister and I are having this weekend. It will be at her house (if you need the address let me know). We will both be selling tons of movies, some furniture, bikes, kid stuff, and much, much more! If you are interested, come on over. We will also have a lemonade stand ran by my adorable nephew if that helps persuade you...

Stressful Day

My day was so frustrating today.

It started with my 8 year-old being angry with me for making him a sandwich for lunch instead of packing cereal for him. It got to the point that he was yelling and screaming and crying because I made him pack the cereal for himself if he wasn't going to pack the lunch that I had made for him specifically. Once he calmed down from that fit, I got all the kids loaded up in the car. Then, the same child realized that he forgot his homework folder and book that he needed to bring to school. He demanded that I go get them off of the kitchen table. I calmly explained to him that he needed to go get them fast. He said I was a bad mom. The kids, then, ended up being late to school because of Sean's humongous fit.  My decision after dropping them off at school was that he will not be playing video games until his attitude gets better.

Work wasn't horrible for the most part. About a third of the way through, I got mad. I have been working hard. My stats are good for the most part. I have earned rewards. Someone who I feel didn't deserve a privilege that I have been trying to get, got that very privilege again. I was furious! My team leader agreed with me. I am going to go in a bit early tomorrow and talk to him again and make it known that I would like to be noticed for my sales at very least.

I vented to my wonderful husband on my way home from work and let it all out. I think I freaked him out a bit when I started crying. I am glad he just let me vent though. I kind of wish I was home when I was crying. I love being in his arms, and I know I would have felt better faster if i were in his arms instead of driving alone.

The good  news is that if these are my worst problems of the day, my life is better than it was 6 months to a year ago.

Don't Know What to Do

I find myself in need of money in a short amount of time (I won't go into details online). I have so far planned a yard sale with my sister and scheduled two Pampered Chef shows. (I will be making calls through this week to try to schedule more.) My wonderful husband who I clearly don't deserve is donating many things such as movies and video games to the yard sale as well as selling some of his gadgets online. I don't want to nor can I go farther into debt to bail us out this time. All I can think of to do is work my butt off and sell, sell, sell. I just hope it is enough.

Goals

It is no secret that I struggle when it comes to reaching goals. There are so many things that I want to do in life. The problem is that I don't have the time to do it all now. I do have time to do a few things though. I know I have to concentrate on the things that are most important right now. I have decided the important things to me right now are finishing school, teaching my children the gospel, building my Pampered Chef business, and losing weight.

I have been working on losing weight. I have been walking the dogs more often with my husband. I have been eating less. My happy news about my weight is that last Friday when I weighed myself, I finally got down to 170! I have been working towards this goal for about a year. Somehow I was able to get down to 171, but then I would start gaining back. Now I am down to 170.  Woo! Hoo! Now on to 165!

I successfully completed my last term without giving up. That is a big step for me. When I got to the point that the classes were getting harder and more overwhelming and I wasn't sure if I could do it any more, my wonderful husband encouraged me and let me bounce ideas off of him for the papers I was writing. I am on Spring Break this week, so I get to rest my mind for a bit before I start my new classes on Monday. I would like to get B's or better this time around. I tried for it last term, but fell short of my goal. I am going to work harder this time to succeed on my goal.

My kids are being given messages about how bad religion in general is, especially my religion. I can tell by the way the act when at church or when church matters are brought up. I have the kids most of the time. I need to have a greater influence on them. I need to do my job as a mother to tech my children about Jesus and what He did for us. I hurt my heart on Sunday while the speakers were talking about the resurrection, my oldest child told me he didn't believe any of it was true and there was no point to what they were saying. The gospel has always been a part of my life. I need my kids to learn the things that I hold so dear to my heart.

When it comes to my Pampered Chef business, I had gotten discouraged last month and let it get me down. I need to get it built up so that I can stay home with my kids and give them the attention that they deserve. I am tired of working to pay for daycare and gas and insurance. I really don't feel like I am making any money once those things are paid for. In fact, my husband I I think that it may cost more for me to work than it would for me to quit, but I need to build up my business before I can quit my job because I have to make the money to pay for gas and insurance at very least.

I am going to do my best at updating my goals still. I believe that the things that I am concentrating on are what are most important to me and my family.

My goals for this week:

1. Walk the dogs 3 times
2. Start my assignments Monday
3. Read scriptures to the kids before their nightly story
4. Book at least one more show

Morning Adventure

This morning, while taking my kids to Grandma's and Grandpa's house so that I could go to work, my wheel started wobbling. I stopped the van, got out, and checked the tire that seemed to be the problem to see if it was flat (I thought that was a reasonable conclusion). The tire was not flat, so I decided to continue my journey. As I got closer to my destination, it shook more and more. I slowed down and hoped that I would make it to the Crumpleys' house so I could explain what was going on and, hopefully, be on my way to work. About a mile away from my safety point, I heard a very loud pop and my front driver's side wheel flew past my window as the car skidded slowly to a stop. All of the kids were in the car (which is what made it more scary). Noel's response from the back was, "What was that?" Eric started shaking and talking about how scary it was.  Sean had the more humorous response. He said with all of the enthusiasm imaginable, "Did you see how high that went?" I, then, proceeded to call Rob to rescue me. As he was on his way, I called my loving husband who offered to call in to work to help me. Luckily, Rob was able to make arrangements to get me to work and offered to work on my car while I was working. Chad picked up the kids after work (have I mentioned how much I love that man). Marleah (the best sister EVER) picked me up from work and let me hang out with her until Chad could pick me up. My day started out interesting, and became a lesson in how much I am loved by many people.

Goal Update

Ok. I know I am way late on this, but life is happening. I won't go into the specifics right now.

So exercise is not something that happens much. I have walked once or twice to pick up the kids when off of work. I say that totally counts. I'll do better. I just have to make the time.

When it comes to school work, I am doing good. I am not getting the work even started until Saturday, but I am getting everything in on time. So far, I have brought one grade to a B and the other one is really close.

This week I will go on a walk at least 2 days, and I will get all of my assignments in on time and do my best on them. That means I need to start them tonight!

Goal Update

Yep. It is that time again. Time for me to share how I have been doing on my goals.

I am going to start with my school goals. I didn't meet them all this week, but I did get my assignments turned in on time. I can't blame anyone but me. I didn't really get started on any of it until Friday night. I was finished around 11:30 Saturday night. I just checked my grades. I got good grades on the assignments, only missing a few points for not siting my reference on one assignment. So my grades so far are: 78.86% in Introduction to Business and 70.91%  in Principles of Management. I have 5 weeks left of this term. It will be a lot of hard work, but I can pull B's out of these classes!

When it comes to my goal of working out, I am not doing well at all. I have felt so overwhelmed with life the last week that I have not wanted to add anything to my daily routine. I need to. I know that . Not only will working out help with my appetite and weight problem, it will help with my moods. I am far less depressed and overwhelmed when I work out.

With how overwhelmed I have been feeling, I have added something else that I am quite excited about. I truly believe that it will take a lot of pressure off of me when I get into the groove of it. I am now an independent consultant with The Pampered Chef. I am so excited about it. I am going to work hard on building my business so that I can make it my only job and work my own hours.

Ok. Now for my goals for this week. I am going to have my Intro to Business chapter read by Tuesday night. I am going to have my Principles of Management chapter read by Thursday night. I am going to have my assignments started by Friday night and turned in on time Saturday night. I will work out at least 3 time this week (this time I'm serious). I will get at least one solid booking for this month. I will fill my prescriptions so that I am sane again (that one is more for my sister and husband that have to listen to me complain).

Jackpot

I think I hit the jackpot! I married a great man this time. He loves me for me. He constantly reminds me of that, too. He steps in and helps with the kids when I need him. He lets me cry when I am overwhelmed with life. He helps clean the house. He lets me know that the things I do are good enough. He understands me more than I do. He loves me more than I deserve!

I have the most beautiful little girl! She is smart and adorable. I love when I get the chance to spend time with her.

My boys are so special! They are the smartest little boys I have ever known. They are so loving. They always tell me that the would rather be with me than at anywhere else.

I love my family!

It All Costs Money

After finding out that my oldest child once again took the time to grind a bar of soap into the drain, I explained that everything in this house costs money. They looked at me like I was crazy. Noel, in her cute 6 year-old way, said, "You mean even my toys?" LOL

Feeling Like a Failure

I have been working outside the home for almost 3 years now. I have one child that really remembers when I was able to stay home with him, one child who kind of remembers, and one who only remembers that she could pretty much do anything she wanted while Mom slept because of working the graveyard shift. I don't want to work outside the home all of the time. Don't get me wrong. I like working. I just don't like the stress it puts on my kids, me, and my new husband.

I currently work until 8pm. That means that I take my kids to school in the morning and come home in time to put them to bed at night. I see my kids maybe 2 hours a day, and pay someone else to see them a lot of the other time.

Due to this work schedule, Sean has been acting more depressed, Eric was flat out refusing to go to school today, and Noel has been a lot more clingy. I started trying to set a side more time to spend with Sean on Sundays. Most Sundays I can do this, but the last few weeks have been hectic with trying to clean out Chad's apartment and the washing machine breaking. I don't even know what to do about Eric. I got him to school about an hour and a half late today. The poor kid seems like he has the wight of the world on his shoulders. I keep trying to tell him that all he needs to do is be a kid, but it doesn't seem to help. Noel is just reacting to every thing the only way she knows how. I have started reading to all of the kids at night lately. When I read to her, I sit next to her on her bed and let her pick the book. It seems to help. I just wish I could do more.

Any one who says that working moms are selfish and don't really love their kids are wrong. I work because I have to. I have bills to pay. All the love in the world doesn't keep a roof over the kids heads and food in their bellies.

Goal Update

Ok. I know I'm a day late. Yesterday was a crazy day. I'll get into that on another post.

For my weight  loss goal. I sucked at this one this week. I was having problems motivating my self to do anything. In other words, I didn't work out at all. I need to start running sometime this week so that I can be ready for the Boulder Boulder and Color Run this May. I know I am crazy for doing both of them so close together, but I have always wanted to try the Boulder Boulder, and the Color Run is for a good cause and something I think the kids can do.

As for school work, I got all of my assignments turned in on time! Woo Hoo! I didn't meet my goals of having the chapters read by Wednesday, but I was close. They were finished on Thursday. Since that was a day late, so was the goal of getting my assignments started. They were started on Friday. The good news is that I was able to get them done on time though. I had a team assignment that I ended up doing on my own. I got 100% on it! I now have brought both of my grades up to C's with 6 weeks left in this term. I know I can get them up to B's in no time.

Ok. Goal time. I am going to start running this week. I will start tomorrow morning after I drop the kids off at school (I have errands to run today before work). I am going to follow the Couch to 5k program. I know the Boulder Boulder is longer than that, but I need to start somewhere. For school, I am going to keep the same goals. I will have the chapters ready by Wednesday night and the assignments started by Thursday night. By reading on my lunch breaks and before I go to work, I shouldn't have a problem with this. Wish me luck!

Goal Update

It is Sunday, goal day.

My first goal for the week was to exercise at least 20 minutes three times. I was concerned taht this wasn't going to happen. Then I went to Chad's apartment to help him clean it up and get everything moved out. Yesterday, I spent at least 20 minutes going up and down the stairs twice. Today, I spent even more time going up and down the stairs. This apartment is on the third floor. My butt, legs, knees, and back hurt so much. It totally counts!
My other goal for the week was to get all of my assignments done and turned in on time. I got half of my assignments in. I was foolish enough to procrastinate my homework until Saturday, the day they were all due. By the time we got back to the house last night, it was about 10pm. I can usually get my work done on time within the 2 hours. I probably could have last night had I not been so exhausted.

I am going to keep my exercise goal for this week. I will get exercise for at least 20 minutes 3 times. When it comes to homework, I read the chapters needed for each class by Wednesday and start the assignments by Thursday. Wish me luck!

Complement From the Teacher

I worked hard on a paper for my Introduction to Business class last week. I even went through the heartbreak of my paper disappearing into the abyss. Luckily, I had most of the work in my head, and I was able to re-do the paper and get it turned in only a half hour late (I have online classes). When I opened the grade book I found that not only did I get a perfect 80 out of 80 points, I got a great compliment from my teacher.

"You did an excellent job on this paper in many ways.  I was truly impressed by the way you expressed yourself in this paper.  It is obvious to me that you not only understand the material but put a lot of effort in making this a successful paper.  I especially liked how you integrated into a descriptive paragraph all of the components that Eric needs in order to build a successful business plan.

Your APA style is good. Please continue to use the same format for the rest of our class.

I am sure that you can tell from your grade that your efforts really paid-off! 

Thank you again for this truly enjoyable submission.

Professor Shaps"

I love being rewarded for my efforts!

New Year, Newish Goals

I made new goals for the year. I am going to actually lose weight this year. I am going to run the Boulder, Boulder. I am going to get a B or better in all of my classes this year. These will be challenging goals, but I can achieve them. I will achieve them.
The first goal of losing weight is something I have been saying for a few years now. I am determined that this is my year. I am going to be down to 135 pounds by the end of they year. Had a good start in January. I am down to 171 pounds. The only thing I really changed is that I have been drinking less soda and taking my lunch to work. These changes were made partially because I wanted to lose weight and partially because I can't afford to have vending machine lunches anymore. I am also going to start working out again this week. My goal for this week is to get at least 20 minutes of exercise 3 times.
My next goal for the year is another one that I have listed before. I am going to run the Boulder, Boulder. I have wanted to do this since my dad participated when I was in high school. I am now married to someone who loves running, and he has ignited this dream again, I can't go running outside while it is this cold because of my asthma, but I will start running as it warms up. I am going to do the couch to 5k plan. I have an app on my phone that will help me do this. I am hoping to be able to start this 9 week program in 2 weeks. That will give me time to get up to the 5k level as well as give me a few weeks to continue running the distance before taking on the race with my husband.
My other goal for this year is to get a B or better in each of my classes. I have been struggling in school for quite a while. Last year I was kicked out for non-participation. This year, I am on academic probation because I failed both of my classes last term. I have finally decided that the degree program that I carefully thought out 3 years ago is the right one for me. (I really do like learning about business.) I think that I just needed to get through some junk in my life before I could focus on my future. Now that my present life is better, I am determined to keep up with making it better. I am going to get my degree and have the life that my family deserves! The way that I am going to do this is by getting all of my assignments turned in on time. So far I have C's in each of my classes, but I am only 4 weeks into my 12 week term. I will keep working hard and bring them up to B's in no time.
I know I need to report my progress to someone to meet my goals. I have support at home from my husband to talk to about my daily progress and ways to better fit my goals into the time that I have available, and I will report on my blog weekly. I don't expect that everyone will want to read my progress, but I can track it better by writing and reading my weekly posts.

2.1.12

I married the most wonderful man who loves me for who I am...no matter how crazy!

Pampered Chef Grand Opening

I am excited to announce that I am starting a Pampered Chef business. This Saturday will be my Grand Opening at 6pm at my house! Everyone is invited! The good new is, since I am now a Pampered Chef consultant, you can book your own show with me if you are not able to make it!