Feeling Empowered

I just finished Old Fashioned on Purpose by Jill Winger. I love this book! I love that she talks about old fashion habits, routines, and ways of living that can slow down life and make it more satisfying. As I was reading it, I decided to follow her advice about my garden. I had been planning to try to find a way to put part of it in the back yard and some in the front yard because I thought it would be weird to have my front yard covered in fruits and vegetables. She suggested that people living in neighborhoods could tear out their grass and just make it a garden. I don't have an HOA, so this is actually a possibility for me. I have already started to ready the front yard for this. When my neighbor asked what I was doing in the yard, I told him my plans. He seemed to actually like the idea. I can't wait to get this idea really going!

I am also going to work on cultivate a community. In the book, she talks about ways to do this. I have wanted to host dinners more often (I haven't done it since my friend who did it a lot moved). I think I can do it on a small scale periodically. I am currently thinking maybe I'll see if I can get something put together for Memorial Day. I have also been talking about putting together a knitting/crocheting circle for a few years. I even had a plan almost in place with someone at church. We just didn't have a place to do it because my dogs are crazy and she was living with her parents. Now, I know I can reserve a room at the library. (I don't know why I didn't know this sooner. Sean literally did it with his D&D club the summer after he graduated.) I don't know how to recruit people for it, but I want to get it done. 

In the final chapter, she makes the point that if you are considering to doing something, think about it instinctively. When you think about it, do you really hate the idea of doing it or are you just scared because it is something new? I have been considering learning to fix sewing machines and starting a business from my home doing that. I know there is a market for it in my area because the only shop I know of in town has closed. That means people need to either learn how to do it themselves, or they have to drive at least 30 minutes to have it done. I have been diagnosing and fixing mine and Noels machines for a while and have gotten fairly good at cleaning and oiling them as needed. I would love to learn more and really be able to fix machines. Making some money on the side would be an added bonus. I just need to find the classes to learn it which I know can be found online.  

Being Useful

Lately, I have been reading You Learn by Living by Eleanor Roosevelt. I've learned a lot! I love this book. For people who question how much you could learn from a book like this that was published in 1960, I challenge you to read it and find for yourself how much it is still relevant today. 

Yesterday, I read a chapter about being useful. In this chapter, she points out that we cannot have true happiness by sitting around waiting for other people to do everything for us. When we get out into the community and do things for other people, it can bring us happiness. This chapter starts with her saying, "Happiness is not a goal, it is a by-product. Paradoxically, the one sure way to be happy is deliberately to map out a way of life in which one would please oneself completely and exclusively. After a short time, a very short time, there would be little that one really enjoyed. For what keeps our interest in life and makes us look forward to tomorrow is giving pleasure to other people...Usefulness, whatever form it may take, is the price we should pay for the air we breathe and the food we eat at the privilege of being alive. And it is its own reward, as well, for itis the beginning of happiness, just as self-pity and withdrawal from the battle are the beginning of misery." She gives examples over being useful (giving service) throughout this chapter. She speaks of helping less privileged boys who needed someone to love and believe in them. She also talks about teaching our children to participate in family responsibilities and in the community. This coincides with the teachings of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints in which we are taught to serve our neighbor. 

In Mosiah chapter 2 in the Book of Mormon, King Benjamin teaches the Nephites the importance of service. He explains to them that not only is he asking them to serve each other, he does it himself. In verse 12, he says, "I say unto you that as I have suffered to spend my days in your service, even up to this time, and have not sought gold nor silver nor any manner of riches of you." Then, he goes on in verses 16 and 17 to say, "Behold, I say unto you that because I said unto you that I had spent my days in your service, I do not desire to boast, for I have only been in the service of God. And behold, I tell you these things that ye may learn wisdom; that ye may learn that when ye are in the service of your fellow beings ye are only in the service of your God." He is teaching us that no one is above serving; not even the king. This a commandment of the Lord; not a commandment of men. 

I love learning from people who have really lived life. Eleanor Roosevelt was a wise woman who we can still learn from if we take the time to do so. The Book of Mormon, as well as other books of scripture, are filled with examples of people we can look up to and follow their examples. The more I read good book filled with wisdom, the better person I want to be. For now, I am going to look for ways to be useful by serving those around me. 

January 2025 Bullet Journal

I am determined to make this month more productive than last month. I won't be disobey trying to make Christmas magical for my adult children, and I hopefully won't be so sick that I land in the ER with asthma issues. I will, however, be working daily on my goals. I have made spreads in my bullet journal to do this. 

First, I have a page that lists my goals of the month and has a tracker to mark off the days that I have completed them:

Then, I have my Miracle morning tracker. On the opposite page is my affirmation for the month. 

Next is my "no spend" tracker. I could be more of a low spend type thing, but Chad and I came up with rules that we both agreed on that we feel will lead us in a better financial path. 

My next spread is for cleaning. This of course is the bare minimum. I hope that everyone else will pitch in. We'll see. 

The only other tracker that I am using is one I made last month for the book that I want to finish and implement what I have learned soon. 

I will be keeping track of my hobbies without a tracker, and the conference talks are being marked in the book. 

Life Changing Book

 

The book The Law of Love is such a wonderful book about how to love without the expectation of getting anything in return. He talks about how to implement it in all aspects of life using personal stories and inspirational quotes. Each time I opened this book, I felt edified. I love this book so much that I am planning to buy it for several people for Christmas. 

Miracle Morning Started

Yesterday, I was finally able to start reading the Miracle Morning because I finished the book I had been reading the night before. I am loving this book. I read about 50 pages the first day. Those that know me know that I don't do this very often, but I was sucked into the pages of this book from the start. When Chad got home from work, I told him what I had learned so far and that I wanted to start doing it in the morning. I figured that even if I don't do it completely correct, at least I am setting the habit and doing something good for myself. He agreed to do it as well because he could tell how excited I was, and he has been looking for something to replace another challenge he had to stop for the time being. 

This morning I got up early and followed each step as I understood them. When I was done, I tried to assess in my head if I thought it worked for me. Did I really need to visualize for 10 minutes? How are these affirmations going to help? Within a few hours, I could tell that all of the steps were worth it! I feel better than I have in a long time. I feel like getting things done. During the downtime for work, I have done some laundry, homework, and cooked a lunch that is more substantial than a sandwich or soup. I have plans to get more done, too. I hope this happens each day. I want this feeling as much as possible. 

Book Store Haul

For date night, Chad and I decided to go to Barnes and Noble. It’s a bit of a drive, but very worth it to be able to walk amongst the books rather than buying them online. We are both in a self-improvement phase of life, and some our books reflect it. 

My haul:

His haul:

Defining Me

With my baby graduating this month, I am finding myself a bit lost. I need to figure out who I am with all of my kids out of traditional school. I know I still need to mother my children. That will never change, but how I mother them is already changing. As this happens, I am on the hunt to find me again. 

What do I know about myself that I don't want to change?

• I love my family. I will always be willing to help my husband and kids when needed. 
• I am deeply religious. I love my Savior, Jesus Christ. I struggled with my faith for a while, but I have gone through too much to waiver in my belief at this point.. 
• I want my bachelor's degree. I am one class and an internship away. I am working with a partner this semester to make sure that I pass my class this time. I will be a college graduate!
• I love to knit. Knitting is my happy place. I have so many good memories around knitting and love how much it has taught me. 
• I am going to keep working towards a homesteading-ish lifestyle. I love making bread, and I am excited to grow a garden and learn to can this year. The idea of having our own bees is growing on me, as well. 

How am I working on myself?

• I am reading a lot. Right now, I am reading The End of Mental Illness by  Daniel G. Amen, MD, and following some of his suggestions by taking certain supplements and adding more exercise to my routine. When I am done with this book, I have another running book to read. 
• I will be running a marathon this year. Chad and I made the goal of doing one the year he turned 50 in 2018. This year came faster than we imagined it would, but we are going to keep this commitment we made with ourselves. That means that I will be running more consistently again. 

Honestly, I don't know what else I am going to do as I find myself. I have been remembering the girl with ambition and drive to succeed, and I miss her. I don't know when she left or where she went, but I want her back. 

My Mentors

I like to surround myself with people who help me be a better person. There are a few people that I admire and want to emulate in one way or another. 

I have a very outgoing friend that includes everyone and helps take me out of my comfort zone. I walk with her once a week when she is not traveling which is completely in my comfort zone, and I appreciate that she accepts this part of me. She also threw a tea party and let me cohost a bit. It was fun to set up and take down, and I actually enjoyed interacting with a larger group of people. She has also invited me on girls’ trips with her friends that I don’t know well. It’s a bit nerve racking for me, but the way she includes everyone makes it more comfortable. I want to be the kind of person that makes people comfortable when they are nervous. 

My former mother in law is someone I wish I was around more often. She and my former father in law are some of the best people I have ever known. She smothered me when I needed it the most. They see the good in everyone. They have been known to invite people to dinners that need support in one way or another. I want to be the kind of person that sees the good in people and is willing to help when needed. 

I have had many people through the years that have provided service to me in one way or another. There was the lady who did my laundry after I had Eric and was struggling to get around. Another took Noel at least once  a week fir the afternoon when I worked the graveyard shift and was told I couldn’t put her in daycare. Then there was a couple that dropped everything when I was in the hospital. I hope I am stepping up like these people at least a bit. 

Of course, I can’t forget my best friends (other than my husband and daughter). One has been my friend longer than anyone outside my family. She supported me through my divorce, encourages me when I need it, and makes time for me when she comes to town. The other stepped up as my mental health declined during the pandemic accepting that what I needed most was human contact. We had lunches in heated tents at restaurants for a few months and continued through the phases of them reopening once a month and continue to make this a priority. I want to be known as the type of friend that prioritizes others’ needs. 

I know I am not perfect, but I also know I am a better person than I was before these people were in my life. I will continue to learn from other people traits that I want to embrace. 

What Progress?

 At the beginning of the year, I set some goals in the four areas suggested by The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints (spiritual, physical, social, and intellectual). I have not been doing very well in some of these goals, but I am ready to make a change. 

I want to keep making progress in the areas that I have had some success and add on that success. I recognize that some of my success has required effort and some has required habit formation. I believe that the areas I need to add focus to would require habit formation. I know that means work will be put into it, but my hope it that it becomes as simple to do eventually as listen to a chapter in the Book of Mormon has become. 

To track my progress, I am going back to the pie chart method that I tried when I attempted the Level 10 thing. I believe that having 8 specific goals (two for each category), I can have better focus and be less overwhelmed than having 10 broad categories.