Church this Week

 I absolutely loved church services this week. It started with Relief Society. We discussed the talk Draw Near unto Me by President Henry B. Eyring. I love this talk. In it, he talks about how we can draw closer to Christ. It goes along with Doctrine and Covenants 88:63:

"Draw near unto me and I will draw near unto you: seek me diligently and ye shall find me; ask, and ye shall receive; knock, and it shall be opened unto you."

I love this verse! Even when I struggled with my testimony, I believed in the power of prayer. Whenever I struggle spiritually, mentally, physically, etc., I know I can turn to prayer. I know that my Heavenly Father is always there for me and listens to my prayer. I have gone through enough difficulties in my life that I know He will not always pull us out of them immediately. We have to trust His timing. I can't say my life is perfect, but I can it is better than it was in the past.

Another way that I draw closer to my Savior is reading my scriptures. I have struggled with this in the past. At a particularly hard time in my life,  I sat in my stake president's office and told him that I struggled with my testimony because I didn't understand why I had to go through another trial. I felt like I had a harder life than anyone else around me. (I have learned since that was not always true.) He asked me what spiritual habits I had. I told him I personally was fasting with a purpose on Fast Sundays, praying and journaling about it daily, and reading the Doctrine and Covenants daily (the scriptures we were studying in Sunday School that year). I explained that I didn't understand how the Doctrine and Covenants applied to me and thought trying to study it was making things worse for my testimony. His simple response was to tell me to stop reading it. He didn't judge me for my struggle, he plainly gave me practical advise that would help. Since then, I have grown to love the scriptures, all of them. We are studying the Doctrine and Covenants again this year in Sunday School. I read through it by the middle of the year for the first time, and I could feel the Spirit as I did so. As I have progressed in the gospel, I have learned to love my time spent studying the word of God. 

I have also learned to love my service in the temple. I liked the temple when I was younger, but when I stopped going, I was more worried what other people would think of me not going than what I was missing out on because I didn't really understand what I was doing. I memorized what I needed to as an ordinance worker, but I didn't know why it was important. I am at a different place spiritually. I love the changes that have been made that make the ordinances more clear. I love going with my husband. He has become such a spiritual person and makes me want to continue to grow. The more we go to the temple together, the more I want to be there. One of the best decisions we made on our recent trip was to go to a temple at each stop. I hope to be able to do that on more trips. 

I love the gospel of Jesus Christ. I am thankful that He made a way for us to return to Him and our Father in Heaven. The way to learn of Him and return to Him is simple and hard at the same time. When we are willing to take the time and put forth the effort to learn of Him and draw nearer to Him, we receive blessings. I am thankful that I have a Heavenly Father who loves me so much that He sent His son as a sacrifice for my sins. It was pointed out in Sacrament Meeting that Christ was part mortal, so he truely felt the pains and sorrows of mortality. When we reach out to Him in prayer, we can know that we are not alone. We can be lifted up by Him and through Him. I love my Savior!

Graduation Trip - Third Leg

 On Friday, Chad and I headed on our way to Provo to visit with my parents after doing an endowment session at the Rexburg temple. I wish I had remembered to take pictures at this temple. I loved it there! Going to Provo from Rexburg was our shortest drive (about 4.5 hours). This stop was also the most relaxing of all of the stops. We mostly stayed at the house hanging out with my dad and stepmom. The first night, I just laid on the bed exhausted for an hour or two waiting for a migraine to subside. Then, I got to talk to my dad for a few hours before going to bed. 

The next morning, my dad made us breakfast before we headed to the Provo City Center Temple to do another session with my dad this time. I love this temple. It is so unique because it was a historical building that had fire damage. There are elements of this building that are original to the building making it one of the most beautiful buildings I have had the pleasure to be in. 

Later, Chad and I finally had ice cream at the BYU Creamery. It was ok. Ice cream is always good, if you get the right flavor. I just didn't understand the hype. Now, I know it is just like any other ice cream place, so I don't have to keep wondering.

We left to go home on Sunday and stopped to see my dear friend at her new house on the way. We finally arrived home around 6:30pm, just in time for dinner. 

I am so thankful that I was able to make this trip! It was a long trip. The stops were further apart than I would have wished them to be, but I don't regret doing it. It was a good way to celebrate me receiving my Bachelor's degree. 

Graduation Trip - First Leg

This week, Chad and I are doing a trip for my graduation in which we are going to St. George, Utah, to visit his mom and uncle for the dirty part. Then, we will head to Rexburg, Idaho, for my graduation and to see my sister and her kids. Lastly, we will go down to Provo, Utah, to visit my parents and see my stepsister before heading home and stopping to see one of my favorite people. 

St. George is a bit different than I had imagined. I thought it would be a lot more open with less people. However, it is beautiful! We drove in Sunday night, arriving around 8pm at Chad's uncle's house. That night we got settled, had a bit of ice cream, and went to bed. Monday morning, we did the tourist thing and walked around the St. George temple grounds. 

Then, we went to see Chad's mom at her apartment. She took us on a tour of the community, introduced us to her friends, took us shopping for my birthday, took us swimming in the fitness center, and took us out to eat. It was a full day, and we were ready to go to bed early. This morning, we went to the Red Cliffs temple with Chad's, aunt, uncle, and mom to do sealings. 

Then, we went on our way to head up to Rexburg, taking a detour to a ghost town about an hour away which was totally worth the time it took to get there and walk around.

Night at the Temple

Last night I subbed at the temple. Chad and I normally work the 2nd and 4th Tuesdays, but I have been filling in here and there when people go on trips and stuff. The thing is, I don't remember saying I was going to be a sub for this particular night. I remember being asked a few months ago and saying I needed to wait to give an answer because I was waiting to find out what my internship hours would be, but I don't think I ever got back to her. Then, Monday I got an email with me on the schedule for the following evening with a thank you for being willing to sub. (We usually get the schedule of where we will be and when the day before we work our regular shifts.) I was confused and a bit disappointed I wouldn't have the night to rest, but I was a bit excited to be scheduled to be working an endowment session. 

As I drove to the temple, I knew that there was a reason I needed to be there that night and assumed it was just to escape the world for a few hours. When I arrived, I was greeted by three women who thanked me profusely for showing up and being willing to be there (maybe the unanswered question was confusing to them as well). It felt so good and so natural to be there! About an hour in, I was assigned to work in initiatory, but there were too many workers, so I sat waiting to see if more patrons would arrive reading The Book of Mormon. 

I felt the need to read Ether  and started with chapter 1. When I got to the brother of Jared speaking to the Lord about needing light in the barges, my mind went to the symbolism of this. We often find ourselves in darkness needing light in our lives. I personally let current events bring me down a lot lately and crave the peace that Christ can give. Just as the brother of Jared asked the Lord to touch the stone to light the barges, I can ask Him to touch my spirit to bring light into my heart and mind. If I had not experienced the difference between my mind for the past week and my mind in the temple last night, I don't believe I would have made that connection. 

After this wonderful experience, I sat in the chapel with the organ playing familiar hymns and prayed to feel the Spirit of the messages and to be able to assist the patrons in whatever way possible. As I stood to welcome them and ask them to follow me, I could feel His spirit so strong that I already had tear in my eyes. This feeling was so strong throughout the session that it was palpable. Just as in January, the peace and joy I felt made making the sacrifice of leaving my family worth every second of being there. I was meant to be there even if I didn't know it.

I am so thankful to my Savior for the sacrifice He made for me. I am thankful for the grace and mercy He shows me when I need it the most. I have no doubt that I will continue to have these experiences and be shocked and in awe each time my Heavenly Father makes it known He is listening and understands what I need. It isn't the big grandiose signs people look for when the want "proof." It is the small things that we could miss if we weren't paying attention. In this case is was the little things that happened at the temple on a night that I wouldn't have normally worked. 

The Peace Settled In

 

Last week was intense. It felt like every time I turned on the news or hopped on social media, more people had reason to fear. Government employees were losing jobs that were considered safe in the past. There were talks of banning mental health medications. (Having grown up the way I did, I have strong feelings about this.) Those in charge even tried to change historical fact. (Can we say 1984?) The more I was bombarded with these things, the more overwhelmed I got. I had to do something about it. 

By the end of the week, I desperately needed to feel peace! Thankfully, I had already scheduled an appointment at the temple. I considered canceling it, and even talked over the pros and cons with my friend and my husband. They strongly encouraged me to go. During my prayer, I asked if I should go or stay home to clean as I do most Saturdays. Then, I opened my scripture and read this:

"Verily I say unto you, all among them who know their hearts are honest, and are broken, and their spirits are contrite, and are willing to observe their covenants by sacrifice - yea, every sacrifice which I, the Lord shall command - they are accepted of me."-Doctrine and Covenants 97:8

 At this point, I knew I needed to make the sacrifice and go. I would still have the time to do laundry, dishes, and the other cleaning I was planning around the house. 

Now, I had faith that I would be blessed by serving in the temple. I was able to feel the excitement of going. I quickly showered, gathered by things, headed out the door, and drove to Fort Collins. As I drove, I craved the peace I knew I could feel once I was there. 

As I sat down in the Endowment Room and the doors closed, I felt a rush of relief. It was such a strong feeling that tears ran down my face. I sat through the session soaking in the peace and relief that can only be felt through the spirit of the Lord. My prayers were answered!

Temple with Michelle

 

Michelle, one of my best friends, and I have been going out to dinner or breakfast at least once a month since October of 2020 when my therapist at the time told me to find someone to do this with. These are months when we find reasons to go out more. This month being one of those months. We went to breakfast last weekend, she took me with her family to the Christmas train when her son-in-law couldn't go. Yesterday, we went to the temple together. It is such a wonderful way to wrap up the year!

Michelle and I have gone to the temple together before, but this was a special trip. Her birthday is next week. He late husband had a tradition of taking her to the temple on or as close as possible to her birthday. Two years ago, I took her for her first birthday without him. Last year, her so took her. This year, we went together for her birthday again. I would love to keep this beautiful tradition going for her as long as she'll let me. Being in the temple is one of my favorite things to do. Going with such a special friend makes it even better. 

Christmas Day 14

 

Then spake Jesus again unto them, saying, I am the light of the world: he that followeth me shall not walk in darkness, but shall have the light of life. -John 8:12

Feeling Her Presence

 

Last night, Chad and I did sealings at the temple. This time, we didn't seal any of our ancestry. We helped other people seal together from theirs. It was a wonderful experience, and it felt so good to be back in the temple after being gone for several months. 

At the end of this session, we went into the Celestial Room. As we sat in silence, I prayed for my cousin. Then, I let the peacefulness of the temple wash over me. This was a wonderful reminder as to why I need to do this more often. 

As I went into the dressing room, I was stopped by one of the ladies for whom we did sealings. She told me that when Chad and I sat in front of the sealer with the light streaming in through the stained glass window, I smiled and was absolutely gorgeous. The thought came to my head, "Just like your mom." At this point, I could feel her presence. All I could do was smile and thank her as I felt my mom beaming with pride, standing beside me. 

I am so thankful for the opportunity I had to do this service for other people in the temple. I am thankful we took the time to go into the Celestial Room. Most of all, I am thankful to the sister who took the time to give me a compliment that brought me closer to my mother. I miss her very much and know there will be a day when we will see each other again. 

Reluctant but Glad

I have recently been called as the secretary in the Relief Society. With this calling comes new responsibilities. (I have had this calling before, but different want different things.) Earlier this week, the new president realized that no one had signed up for the monthly temple trip. (We have only been in these calling for about two weeks, so that is not too surprising.) She sent a text out to the presidency asking us to go, and I agreed. The problem was that I had also said I would take my friend lunch and hang out with her the same day because she had surgery earlier in the week and we hadn't had our monthly lunch together yet. When I realized what I had done, I felt bad and considered backing out of the temple trip. As of Friday morning, I did not know who was going and  was very tempted to cancel. A big part of me felt guilty for this. 

Friday afternoon, I was told that there were five of us going and was asked how many I could fit in my car (5 including me if the people in the backseat squish). At this point, I knew I was locked in to this trip. I spent a good amount of time dreading it and feeling guilty that I would have to make lunch with my friend late. I stressed about it so much that it interrupted my sleep. 

This morning, I got up and got ready and reminded myself of the feelings of peace I get in the temple and started to feel peace. Suddenly, I was in a better mood as I continued to get ready. When I met up with the other ladies, I was ready to fully participate the blessings of the temple. There were only four of us that showed up, so we were able to all fit in my car. 

I am so happy that I went to the temple this morning. I had some wonderful memories as I participated and learned things I had not thought of previously. I texted my friend as we left the temple and called her after dropping everyone off at the church. She was not upset at all. We have had lunch at 1pm in the past, so it wasn't something unusual. Also, I let her pick what food I would pick up on the way to her house and what I would buy for her and her son for dinner. 

Even though I left the house before 8am and didn't get home until about 5pm, I feel like my day was well spent. I do not regret my decision other than not getting my homework done after I got home. (I now have only two hours until everything is due and have done very little.)

My Favorite

 

I love this man. He understands me in a way no one else does. He supports my dreams, and is my biggest cheerleader. I have very few regrets in this life because all of the struggles I faced before meeting him, led to to him, and everything since has brought us closer together. Some people cringe when they hear how quickly we were married after we finally started dating. To me, it just felt natural. We were meant to be together for eternity.