Killers of a Certain Age - Book Review

 

The book choice for my book club over the last month was Killers of a Certain Age. This is a book about a group of women who are paid assassins who have been working for "The Museum" for 40 years and are told they are being forced into retirement. However, they find out that they are not quietly going into retirement. They have a bounty placed on their heads. Through the book we are taken through the process of finding out why they have a bounty on their heads and what they do about it. 

When I was told the basic plot of the book, I was quite excited to read this book. For the most part, it is a good book. My main complaint is that the flash backs in the first half of the book are not in good places. Through the flashbacks, we learn how they are recruited, trained, and build relationships within the company. These are important bits of information, but I feel like it would have been better had they been at the beginning of the book and used a flash forward type of thing as the book went on. Another thing that may have worked would have been somehow including the recruiting and training into the dialog. I'm not a writer, so I don't even know if that would work. I just didn't like how the author would have a cliff hanger at the end of a chapter then suddenly change to something from the past. Again, this is only a criticism of the first half of the book. In the second half of the book, flashbacks were used to show the relationship between the main characters and the people they were perusing. This felt like a good use of flashbacks. (I'm not a total hater of the flashbacks. I just think it is used wrong or too much in a lot of novels now days.) The good part of the book is that the basics of the plot move along at a good pace. The imagery was perfect with not too much description but enough to really know, understand, and feel a part of what was going on. Overall, I gave this book 3 stars on Goodreads. I will probably not read the second book because I was satisfied with the ending of the book and don't feel the need to. One person in my book club read it and said it was ok but not as good as the first one. 

It took me almost 2 weeks longer to read than it should have (my deadline was July 16, but I finished today). This was not because it was a bad book. I have traveled over the last month which slowed me down, and I spent way too much time on my phone over the last few months. One of these days, I will give myself more time to read like I did at the beginning of the year. 

The Invisible Live of Addie LaRue - Book Review

I believe I have a new favorite book, The Invisible Life of Addie LaRue. The author, V.E. Schwab, is a wordsmith! It has been a long time since I've listened to or read a book that has made me feel something real other than when I read scriptures, but this feeling is different. The words of this book are almost poetic, and there is so much symbolism that even I am able to see it and enjoy it. 

This book is about a girl who makes a deal with the devil, or as they call it, the darkness, but she doesn't understand how it will manifest. Instantly, she is forced to live centuries being forgotten by everyone as soon as she is out of sight. One day, she meets a man who remembers but only because he is also cursed due to a deal he made with the same devil. 

Here are some of my favorite passages:

"Take a drink every time you hear you're not enough.

    Not the right fit.

    Not the right look.

    Not the right focus.

    Not the right drive.

    Not the right time.

    Not the right job. 

    Not the right path.

    Not the right path.

    Not the right future.

    Not the right present.

    Not the right you.

    Not you.

    (Not me?)

    There's just something missing..." (page 229)

"...when the devil speaks again, there's a new depth to his voice, a steady warmth like a blanket drawn around his shoulders. Hendry Feels himself learn into it. 

    'You want to be loved,' says the stranger...'And I can give that to you for a price of something you won't even miss...'

    And he doesn't think any of this is real.

    So it doesn't matter.

    Or perhaps the man in the rain is right. 

    He just has nothing left to lose. 

    In the end, it's easy.

    As easy as stepping off the edge.

    And falling. 

    Henry takes his hand, and the stranger squeezes, hard enough to reopen the cuts along his palm. But at last, he doesn't feel it. He doesn't feel anything, as the darkness smiles, and says a single word.

    'Done.'" (pages 233-234)

"A curtain falling on a play: the lovely sets, the stagings, the trained actors all vanish behind the darkened cloth.

    Surrender.    

    An order whispered in the dark.

    A demand made over and over and over for years - until it stopped. How long ago did he stop asking? But of course, she knows - it was when his method changed, when his temper towards her softened." (page 410)

I could go on and on about this book. It has woken something inside me that I didn't know was there: a greater love for fiction. Who knew that joining a book club at the library could bring me this much joy? 

Reading in 2026

One of my goals for the year is to read more books than I have in the past few years now that I don't have assigned reading for school anymore. For many people, reading 24 books in a year is not that hard to do. For me, it is a challenge because I don't know if I have done it when not reading children's books (which I am also reading for my part-time job). I am a bit of a slow reader, but I savor what I'm reading and don't see that changing any time soon. 

One way that I am doing this is by reading at least one nonfiction book each month. So far, this is going really well. I read 7 Habits of Highly Effective People in January, Atomic Habits in February, and I am currently reading Old Fashioned on Purpose which should be done by the end of the month without a problem. These books have definitely added to my knowledge and helped me make some positive changes in my life. 

I have also joined a book club through my local library to help me expand my reading into other genres, keep me accountable with my reading goals, and help me socialize. So far, this book club is helping in all of those ways. Both books we have read so far pushed me a bit outside of my comfort zone. The first book was Then She Was Gone. The story telling was decent in this book but reading about a teenager being tortured and killed gave me nightmares. The next book was The Rose Code. This was a very long book, but I really liked reading the historical aspects of it. I googled parts of the story more than once to see if it was real or fiction and was elated when they were real. When I found out that the main location in the book was not only real but became a museum, I told my husband we need to find a way to go to England to see it. The book we are reading now is Clytemnestra. All I know about it is that it is Mythological fiction. I'm dreading it a bit because I'm not really a fan of mythology, but I will make myself read it all of the way through by next month's meeting (we meet on the third Thursday of each month). I have told myself that I will read each book assigned no matter what for at least a year. If at the end of the year, I decide the book club is not for me, I will just stop going. There are plenty of people on the wait list willing to take my spot if I decide to walk away. Until then, I will enjoy expanding my horizons, learning about subjects I know very little about, and talking to a group of ladies who I would probably not have met in any other way. 

A funny thing has happened as I have worked on reading more along with my other goals for the year. I have been on my phone less, watched TV less, and enjoyed life more. It is amazing how much of life can be enjoyed when I'm not constantly bombarded by the news! I also feel like I am learning more about myself and the world by simply experiencing what it has to offer. I am excited to see how things change as I make these simple adjustments in my life that add up to significant changes in the long run. 

A Bit Odd

 I have always been a bit odd. I don't fit into a lot of boxes. In elementary school, I was the quiet kid that was older and bigger than most of the other kids. As I teenager, I was one of the few people I knew with divorced parents, and I was definitely the only person who had a mother in a relationship with a woman. (It was the 90s. The world was different.) As an adult, I have always been socially awkward and constantly wondering if someone was being nice to me because they actually cared of if they were just being fake. (I have been around so many fake people that I have gotten better at figuring this out quicker.) This made social situations hard for most of my life, but I am caring less and less over the past 5 or 6 years. 

I sit at home working Monday through Friday with little interaction with the outside world during working hours. This has caused me to feel like I'm going crazy more than once. I am constantly on the lookout for things that may indicate I'm mentally ill like my mother. So far, I have only been diagnosed with situational depression. After a while of my husband doing his best to get me out of the house, I started finding my own ways to interact with other people, and I was determined to not change for anyone. 

I joined a virtual book club a few years ago that fizzled out before we finished discussing the first book. (We were reading one chapter a week and discussing it.) The book chosen made me think about myself and my habits differently and helped me embrace the things that made me different. I started knitting and crocheting in church that summer. You know what happened? People started asking me what I was making and complimenting me on my work. There have since been other people, adults and children, knitting and crocheting at church. I wasn't as weird as I thought with this desire. 

About a year later, I started working in the temple. I was worried that I would struggle to learn the things I needed to learn. I was worried that being a divorced and remarried person would make me stand out. I was worried that I would struggle with social situations. None of this was a problem. I learned at the same pace as the other ladies who started around the same time. There are other women who have been divorced and remarried. No one cares that I say odd stuff and talk about death more than the average person. I am accepted and have made friends. 

Doing magic with children has really taken me out of my comfort zone, but kids don't care. They just want to learn magic and play. I have said it many times and feel it even more now that my kids are all grown up: little kids are amazing! I love how even the smallest things are exciting and new to them. Best of all, they just see me as an old lady teaching them magic and have no other judgements of me. 

I have also joined a book club at my local library. When I did this, I worried that the books I like would be too odd for them. It's not. Not everyone likes the same genres, and no one seems to judge others for their likes and dislikes. We are all reading the same book at the same time and expanding our likes and dislikes together. It doesn't matter that I don't know as many literary terms. I just don't talk when they talk about those parts of the books. I will probably understand and be able to talk that way after a few months. For now, I am just another person in the group that has read the book and has opinions.

I know that I make choices that are odd sometimes, and I will continue to do so. The thing is, I don't care anymore. If you don't like my garden in my front yard, don't look at it. If you don't like that I read non-Fiction every morning, that's ok because you aren't the one reading it. If the fact that I have a Barbie display in my bedroom puts you off in some way, who cares? It makes me happy. If you don't like that I'm religious, it doesn't bother me. I will respect your beliefs as long as you respect mine. You don't like that I am politically more in the middle and won't choose who or what I vote for without research? Oh, well. I am don't changing who I am to appease other people. I am different, but everyone should be different. We weren't made to be the exact some. That would make for a very boring existance.