Fancy Noel

Noel loves Fancy Nancy books.  She lately has been wanting to be "fancy" as well. The result is her being picky about her hair and wearing a lot of dresses or skirts.

Dinner at My House

A week from Saturday my kids will be spending the night at their grandma's house.  That means I get to have a night without children!  I have to work the next morning, so I can't do a big girls night out/in.  I am going to have a dinner at my house though. Just us grown-up girls.  I will make the main course and take care of drinks.  I would like anyone coming to bring either a desert or side dish (please no chocolate since I am allergic to it).  Here is your official invite:
When: Saturday, Jan. 22 @ 6pm
Where: My House 

Please, let me know if you are planning on coming so I know what to plan.

The Faith of My Girl

I must start this off by explaining that about 2 weeks ago a family member (I'm not sure if I am still allowed to call him my nephew) lost his battle with cancer.  Since the funeral, the kids have asked me several questions about death and his illness.  I have done my best to let them know that they can ask me any questions about it or anything else that is going on around them.
Just now, while eating lunch, my sweet girl says, "Mom, I know what a casket is."
I calmly responded, "Yes.  Unfortunately, you do."
She looks at me seriously and says, "What?  Jesus will resurrect him."

Eric's Birthday

Eric got what he wanted

and frosted and decorated his own cake.

Happy Birthday, Eric!

Christmas Pics

I didn't even realize that I had forgotten to post Christmas pictures until I was getting the pictures of Eric's birthday from my camera and the Christmas pictures were still on the camera.  Oops!

So Far...

So far since John told me he was leaving I have lost 6 pounds.  Most of that was from not really eating for the first week.  The last 2 pounds were just a miracle.  I have tried to do my Biggest Loser game a few times.  It gets hard.  The fact that I have a broken toe that was not healed very well yet and did jumping jacks with the game didn't help.  (I never realized how important my little toe was until about a month ago.)  I am doing my best to try to get at least some exercise done once a day.  I accomplished at least 5 minutes 3 days this week, so I am counting that as an improvement.
I have found that I am getting worn out and cranky earlier lately.  I think I am pushing myself too hard, but I guess I have no other choice.  I have to work and life as a single mom is now my reality.  The funny thing is that when it comes to home life, it isn't a whole lot different.  In some ways it is less stressful because I am not worrying about where my husband is and what he is doing.  It is a bit easier to push myself to do certain things like cleaning and putting the kids to bed because there is not another parent in the house who should be helping do it.  I am starting to feel overwhelmed by all of the responsibilities that I have, but I think that once a routine is in place that feeling will calm down.
I have days where I am so depressed it takes all I have to get out of bed.  Other days I feel so good about my future that I am upbeat and energetic.  I don't think I will get off of this roller coaster anytime soon.  I hope it gets better once we have filed for divorce and especially once it is final.
I will have something less depressing next time I post.  Eric's birthday is coming up, so be ready!

The Future Me

I got a Wii for Christmas with The Biggest Loser game. I am feeling more motivated to get up and move.  I set up my avatar for a 12 week program.  I know it will be hard, but hopefully I can do it for that long.  I am going to try to concentrate on one week at a time.  I hope that by the time I finish the 12 weeks, my divorce will be final, and I will be ready for a new life and a new me.  I am starting to feel more positive about my future the more and more I am away from him.  I have noticed that when he is around that I am more stressed out and beat up.  I know I have to have dealings with him for the rest of my life because we have kids together.  With any luck, however, I will either find a new job or get a schedule that is more conducive to being a single mom in the next few months.

Pizza With The Kids

Sean's pizza (top), Eric's pizza (bottom)

My pizza (top), Noel's smiley pizza (bottom)

Monday night I decided to do something fun with my kids for dinner.  I went out and got stuff to make pizzas.  We each got to make one.  Then we had a picnic in the living room and watched the old version of How the Grinch Stole Christmas.  We all had a good time!

Excuse Me

I would just like to clarify something.  My kids don't know totally what is going on.  All they know is what they have figured out on their own.  At least two of the three are upset enough by that.  Talking to me about my problems in front of them will make me mad.  Even if they did know completely what is going on, coming up to me at church and talking to me about my husband leaving is inconsiderate especially in front of my kids.

What's Going On

Well, life knows how to through me a curve ball.  Perhaps it is not as unexpected as I would have hoped however.  I will post more later, but for now I will just say that John is moving out.  He will not tell me where he is going, but I know already.  I am not stupid.  I know how to pick up on enough clues to draw a fairly accurate conclusion.  I have been turned into a villain when he is speaking to his friends.  He knows the truth.  I have done things I am not proud of.  I think he knows now that I will NOT take how he treats me.  I will not sit in the dark anymore.  I do need him when it comes to the kids because they adore their father and I don't want to traumatize them or have them go without the necessities in life.  Other than that, at this point there is not a way for us to have even a friendship.  He would tell you it is because if what I have done, but we both know it goes beyond just me.  I know he doesn't read my blog, but I do suspect that he has friends that spy on my blog.  Maybe they will tell him what the evil witch has posted about him.  I don't know.

Book of Mormon

As some people know, I have been having a very hard time with my testimony lately.  I won't go into all of the reasons right now.  About a week ago the missionaries visited our family and gave us the first discussion.  They challenged us to read at least part of the Book of Mormon and pray about it.  This morning, as I was getting the kids breakfast, I decided it was a good time to look for the mp3's I have of the Book of Mormon and turn it on.  I think I am going to do this more often.  I am going to make a goal right now to listen to the Book of Mormon on the way to or from work at least 3 days a week.  This means putting off my Dave Ramsey pod casts, but I am up to this challenge and Dave can wait for a little while.  I'm not sure this will help, but it couldn't hurt. Right?

Decorating the Christmas Tree

Loving Siblings

Noel was having a hard time finding a seat that she liked for watching TV.  Eric decided to share his.

Now if I could just get them to act like this more often...

Crazy Dog

When I bought this trash can, the idea was that one with a lid would keep the dog out of it.  She has since learned how to get the lid open long enough to start pulling out stuff near the top (at least enough to start licking it).

Noel's Lunch

Bacon and Slim Fast...mmm

3rd and 4th Grade Play

Our star

Eric has a speaking part this year.  Apparently the loose tooth was a bit distracting while waiting for his part.

Of course there was singing and dancing!

Look Who's 5!

My pretty little princess turned 5 yesterday.

We had a fun little family  party complete with a pink princess cake.

She got the Polly Pocket that she was dying for.

Of course she also got the new Tinker Bell movie.

Our First Snow

It wasn't much of a snow, but we had to wait until November 9 to get any snow at all.

More Pretty Pants

These seem to be Noel's favorite so far.

Halloween Pictures

Snow White

Obi-Wan Kenobi

Annikin Skywalker

This is what I get for telling my kids to pose like they are getting their picture taken.

We had fun this Halloween.  We went trick-or-treating at my work followed by a trip to a few houses.  The kids got more candy than they have ever had in the past.