Conference Rolls

A while back, a lady at church talked about her tradition of making cinnamon rolls for her family for General Conference weekend. I knew people had this tradition but wasn’t too concerned with doing it myself. However, Chad had not heard of this and got very excited. I couldn’t tell him know when he was that excited about a new tradition, so I started making cinnamon rolls for conference a few weeks later. Most of the time, I make them from scratch. When I have a stressful semester, it’s Pilsbury to the rescue. This time it is a Pilsbury conference. My husband and kids are happy, and I can keep my sanity. 

Volunteering at the Race

I finally had my opportunity to volunteer at a race. I have never done this before, but I was glad I did it. There were many events going on, and I got to congratulate everyone as they came across the finish line. It was a blast, and I would recommend anyone do this that has any interest in the behind the scenes of these events.

The event we attended was the Last Call Triathlon.  There was a traditional sprint triathlon, a super sprint triathlon, one in which people were on paddle boards rather than swimming, aqua bike, and duathlon (I may be forgetting something). Chad participated in the duathlon and did great (in my opinion). I was first stationed with the duathlon participants to make sure they were had the proper markings on their arms and left leg. Then, I was near the transition area to try to keep the spectators off of the course and cheer on the people coming in from the beach to the bikes and direct the runners out of the bikes to the running course. Finally, I was sent to the finish line to collect the timing chips that were on the participants' ankles. It was gross because they were sweating but rewarding because I got to congratulate everyone as they stopped for me to get the bracelets. It was fast moving and made the time go by faster than I believe it would have if I had worked the aid station as I was originally assigned. It was fun to see all of the events as they took place. It was eye opening to see this small part of the innerworkings these events. I would totally recommend anyone interested in racing to do this when they can!

The Purpleness

I may have a bit of an obsession with purple. It snuck up on me. I didn’t used to like purple so much, but I am drawn to it now. It doesn’t even seem to matter what shade it is. 

When I was a kid, purple was the color I was given, and I hated it. My sister would get things in pink, and I was stuck with purple. I remember hating that my mom bought me a purple scripture case because I was stuck with it for the foreseeable future. I still have that scripture case with the stuff in it from my adolescence. It is a reminder of so many things including my mom. 

As I grew up, I tried to avoid the color for many years. I honestly don’t remember when I gave into accepting it. I remember that my favorite shirt my freshman year of high school was a royal purple, but I swore I didn’t like that color at the same time. I remember having a shirt I really liked when I was in my early 20s that was lavender, and there were a few here and there for a while. At that point, I knew it was one of my favorites. It was one of my wedding colors for my first wedding, after all. However, it wasn’t an obsession as far as I remember. 

By the time I married Chad, I knew I loved purple more than any other color even though it was not one of my wedding colors for the most important wedding of my life. Chad had always known of my affinity towards purple and even encouraged it. 

Now, I am sitting at my desk wearing a purple shirt and purple nail polish with a purple stone in my engagement/wedding ring while knitting a purple sweater as I live my purple life. 

So Tired

I have been so tired lately, and I don’t know why. I have been getting to sleep a bit earlier than usual the last few nights, and I still get my 20 minute nap during my lunch break. My schedule hasn’t changed that much other than adding school into the mix, but I do that all of the time without feeling like this. I should go to the doctor to see if my thyroid meds are off, but I hate bloodwork being done. Also, if the prescription is too low, I would have to start taking two pills a day and go back every 60 days until it is figured out. I know these aren’t great reason to not take care of myself. I really should get this figured out so I can feel normal again. 

Volunteer Experience Soon

A few months ago, I signed up to volunteer at a race Chad is doing. Today, I got the email with my assignment because the race is this Saturday. I will be manning the aid station for the run from 8:30 to 10:45. I’m getting so nervous. I know I can’t really mess it up, but I will be with people I don’t know, and I don’t do great in social situations. I’m getting a bit better, but it is still scary. I’m happy that I will be doing something that give me the chance to see him though even if it will be just for a little bit. Also, I should be done in time to cheer him on at the finish line. Hopefully, it will be a good experience. 

Sean is 20

 

Twenty years ago, my Sean was born. The was magic from day one. After a year and a half of getting up every two hours with Eric, I was granted a full night’s sleep the first night with Sean as we spent a night in the hospital alone together. He was my little snuggle boy until he was too big. Now, he is the one that comforts me when I’m sad, hugs me when he feels like it, laughs at my bits of dark humor, and helps fill my life with joy. I love this sweet boy! I couldn’t imagine ifs without him. 

My Sunflowers

 The first year in this house, I planted sunflowers in front of the bay window not knowing how big they would be because I had never done this. They were huge and took over that flower bed as they grew taller than the windows.  I loved them and hoped to be able to grow them again in the future. 

I have tried several times since to grow a beautiful sunflower garden, but I have failed over and over. There were times that they didn’t get enough water, and there were times the bunnies ate them before they could grow. It has been frustrating, but I longed for those beautiful flowers again. 

I tried again this year after getting some advice from a friend about other flowers. I figured I would alter that advice for these flowers, and I threw out everything I had tried in the past. My flower bed that had previously had a few shrubs that had since died was looking sad, so I decided this was the perfect place. I took my envelope of seeds and randomly spread them around. Then, I put a layer of top soil over them and watered them like crazy. (The fact that we had a wet summer for a while helped.) This last week I finally got to start enjoying the fruits of my labor as they started to bloom. (I had a bit of a late start, so I got a late result.) I have loved walking out my front door to more flowers blooming every day! 

Saturday, someone vandalized my flowers. I don’t know who or why. All I know is that the Ring shows my biggest, most beautiful sunflowers swaying in the breeze when Eric picked up Sean to go to a wedding, and they were cut down but the time I left to pick up dinner about 45 minutes later. I honestly would have thought it was the bunnies if one of them had not been cut off at the head and thrown in the middle of the front yard. 

After I got home, I decided to make the best of the situation. I went out and got the flowers to bring in, got out a vase, and cut the stems down to a size that would fit in the vase. Now, I get to enjoy them each time I walk into the dining room which is quite often since it is in the front of the house 

I don’t know why someone chose to hurt my flowers, but I choose to continue to enjoy them. 

The Week

This past week has been a bit hectic. I’m not sure I can pin down all of the reasons but I know some of it has been school related. I have three classes this semester. Two are intense. The other is a class I can din in one or two hours. Noel’s school stuff feels intense, too. Taking her to and from school takes a lot out of me. I need to get her and Sean another appointment for their driving tests. I really need them to be able to drive so I can stop being a taxi. I know that things will be difficult for the rest of the school year as she gets closer to completing high school and I get close to finishing my degree. I am starting to see a glimpse of the bigger picture. I am sure this will all be worth the struggles. 

The Call I Needed

Yesterday, I got to see my Eric. His phone had broken, and we needed to get him a new one. We ended up getting him one of the cheapest phones at the TMobile store because I still have 4 payments left on the one he had, and I still need to buy birthday presents for Sean. He was ok with it and fully understood the reasons. I love when he calls me or wants to see me. I don’t care what the reason is for this to happen. I also like knowing that he still needs me in some little way. (I know he is an adult, but I will always be his mom.) When we were done, I didn’t want to let him go. I knew I would miss him even though I will see him again on Monday. 

This morning I was missing everyone it seemed as I sat at home working with Chad at work at Noel at school. I miss Eric, my dad, my stepmom, and my sister (mostly my sister). Then, I remembered Marleah doesn’t leave for work until about 10am, so I called her. We talked for a little while, and it was wonderful! I needed to just sit and listen to her tell me about my niece and nephew for a while. I needed her to tell me how life in another state was going. I just needed to feel that connection with my sister. It’s hard for her to be so far away as our children are growing up. I never imagined her being gone so long. 

Broken Hook

 My crochet hook broke yesterday. The one I bought at Walmart when I bought the yarn and hooks for my sweater: the sweater I am excited about. I took this hook camping last week. I freaked out when I lost it more than one. Honestly, I love this sparkly, yellow hook. 

I was a bit sad when it broke, but I thought I could fix it somehow. I searched the house for tape, but it has all disappeared. I searched for a hook that I remembered having even though I don’t like it much, but it has disappeared, too. Then, I remembered I have bullet journal supplies. I taped it with washi tape. It wasn’t strong enough to keep using. Then, I remembered I had a hook the same size with the stuff I used to make animals (my “coworkers”) during the pandemic. Thankfully, it works wonderfully and my gauge hasn’t changed, and I can keep working on the (hopefully) perfect, purple sweater. 

The back should be done today, and I will be able to start one side of the front before I pick up Noel from school. 

Small Miracle

Sunday, I accidentally locked my keys in my car. I had them in my crochet bag (I knit or crochet to help me concentrate at church), but stuff fell out when I went back to the car for gum. Some how I missed them when I put stuff back in before I locked the door. 

We have roadside assistance with our insurance which has come in handy in the past, but I wanted to do my best to keep the Sabbath holy, so I asked someone at church that is known for being resourceful if they knew how to break into my car. It is a Kia. I figured it would be easy. Unfortunately, they were not able to despite their best efforts. Reluctantly, I used ordered a locksmith. That was when a small miracle happened. 

I told this man who was trying to help me that the last locksmith the insurance sent out made me uncomfortable, and Chad was busy inside and unable to stay with me. This man with whom we have struggled to get along for years, stayed with me as I waited along with his wife and sons. We talked and laughed and passed the time together. It turned out I had no reason to worry because this locksmith was not creepy and got the job done fast. I appreciated his willingness to help, though. It was the tender mercy I needed at the time. 

How Great Thou Art

The closing hymn in sacrament meeting this last Sunday was How Great Thou Art, a classic, well known Christian hymn. This brought back memories from my childhood. I remember an advertisement on TV selling Andy Griffith’s gospel album. My mom heard a clip of him singing How Great Thou Art and wanted this set of cassettes. She was struggling with the death of her own mother, and the combination of his voice and this hymn was a comfort to her. I don’t remember if she actually ordered the set, but I do remember her reaction when this commercial would come on. As I sang with the congregation, I felt comfort in this memory. I love these sweet memories of my mom experiencing the sweet, tender mercies of the Lord in her time of grief. 

Camping with Friends

 Thursday afternoon, I left with some friends to go camping at Dewey Lake I the Red Feather Lakes area. One friend had a camper that we brought up, and we had a plan to go paddle boarding that night and the next day. We planned this for several weeks. Unfortunately, the weather did not agree with our plans. 

As we drove up, the rainstorms came in. There was rain and snow and more. By the time we got up there, it was only 45 degrees. We were all wearing sandals and were cold by the time we were done setting everything up. The decision was made to turn on the heater in the camper and play games. 

I loved Thursday night. Sitting at the table that would later be my bed, eating good food that one of the ladies brought up and carefully prepared, playing board games, laughing, and talking was the highlight of me week. 

The following day, we got up and tried to make a plan for the day. A fire was built with wet wood and the help of a fire starter log from our neighbors. We had a delicious breakfast prepared by one of the other ladies and hot chocolate in cute mugs that I brought. At this point, the other three ladies decided to go paddle boarding. My board was accidentally left behind, and I was already very cold and struggling to get warm. I decided to sit in a camping chair and crochet near the shore. It was a bit lonely, but I felt like a made the right decision. I would have taken way too long to warm up after going into the water. Even though I know this, I am sad that I didn’t get on the water. 

After a delicious lunch, we drove around in the mountains for a few hours before we were on our way to dinner and home. I was dropped off around 8:30 or 9 last night. It was a long day. My daughter and husband called me as we drove home. My body was tired. My emotions got the best of me at one point. In the end, I was glad to have gone and glad to be home. 

Class Meeting

My new semester started this week. I am taking my last three classes before my internship. That means of course that I am going to have another difficult semester. I will be taking Abnormal Psychology, Teaching Family Life Ed, and a devotional class (a one credit class). 

Last night, I attended a Zoom meeting for the teaching class, and I am both intimidated and excited for this class. I learned about the huge project involved to complete the class and a bit about how it is broken up. I will need to either design a workshop and present it in my community alone or create online learning materials including video presentations with a partner. I am hoping I can find a partner because doing a workshop in front of people I don’t really know sounds like torture to me. I know either one will be a lot of work, and I think I am ready for that. I guess it is a good thing that I was released from my calling so I can concentrate on this better. 

Homecoming Night

Last night was Homecoming for Noel’s school. She went out with a group of friends. I took pictures of her in her dress before she was picked up. She was absolutely beautiful!

Funeral Update

I decided not to attend Matthew Gosset's funeral, but I did bring food for the luncheon for their close friends and family. I did this because I really struggle going to funerals. I know no one likes to go to them. They are not happy events. For me, funerals are reminders of the worst moments of my life. I know that makes me sound selfish, but I feel like I did still serve the family. I even still talked to Matt's dad because he was there when I dropped of the food. I talked to him about his son when my ex taught him. He told he about his death and sad, tragic life leading up to it. He told me about the ways in which he and his family had tried to help him. I made me feel so bad for this poor father and all the family had gone through. I could not imagine what I would have done if my kids were to go down that path. I could see the pain in his eyes as he talked to me. As I was leaving, some of the parents of kids who are now in their 30s from church started showing up and sharing memories of their kids growing up together. I hope these sweet parents felt the support they needed. 

Sweater Restart

I have been faithfully working in my purple sweater for about two and a half weeks. The back was getting huge, and I was using more yarn than I thought I would need. I even ordered more yarn just in case. 

Today, I held up the back panel to see he progress. It was huge! I held it over my back to see if it was my imagination, and it was bigger than I thought. It reached below my knees, and I still had 20 more rows to crochet. I read the instructions for the main stitch again, and realized that I was doing it wrong which made it much bigger. 

The only solution I had was to take it out and start over. That meant unraveling two and a half skeins of yarn. It was a sad process, but I know it would not have worked in any way to keep going. 

I have restarted it, and I am still excited about the sweater. I can’t wait to get it finished. I know it will take longer since I start classes next week, but it will be with it to have the final product. If I have too much yarn, I will make the matching bag. 

Bruno Major Concert

A while back, Noel bought tickets to last night’s Bruno Major concert with the hope that her friend would be able to go with her. She later found out that the friend couldn’t go because it was a school night, so she decided to take me. I have heard a bit of his music when Noel plays it in the car, but I wasn’t as familiar as I would have preferred. Thankfully, he put on a great show. He has a great voice, and I really like his style of music which I would describe as kind of a blues/pop style. That being said, my favorite part was Noel’s reaction to him coming on stage and each song that she got loved. 

The Tenderness

Today in Sacrament Meeting, on of the boys who was going to pass the sacrament got a bloody nose. He calmly walked up to a bishopric member and asked for tissues, and they gave him the box. A bit later, another bishopric member calmly walked down to his bench, a sat down next to him, told him to go to his mom, and asked his own son what he needed to do to take the boy’s place. It didn’t take long for all of the boys to start calmly explain ti him. Then, the older brother of the boy who walked away came to the front bench as he tied his tie and took the spot for his brother.  I sat a few benches away touched by the love, compassion, and tenderness shown by all involved. 

Not Sure How to Feel

I found out today that someone my ex taught in Sunday School many years ago was murdered in Denver this week. When I knew him, he was a troubled kid who had been thigh some horrible things. I worked with his mom at Dish Network for a bit and enjoyed talking to her when she was able to come to church. 

His parents moved out of state about a year ago, and I hadn’t heard from the since. Then, his dad posted something on the ward Facebook page that if anyone wanted funeral information to text him a few days ago. I didn’t even know this person had died. Today, the Elder’s Quorum president sent out an email with the funeral information, so Chad Googled Matthew Gossett to figure out if he knew him and found out what had happen. I told him that he wouldn’t have known him, but I remembered him. 

Now, I don’t know how I am supposed to feel. I didn’t know him that well to begin with, my ex did. I did get to know his mom for a bit, though. I think at this point I feel bad for the parents. I can’t imagine the pain they are feeling right now. They are nice people that have had some bad things happen to them; this would be worse than any problem I know of. I wish there was something I could do to show them my support. 

The Moon

The moon is really big tonight. (I know this is because it is so close to the earth.) As I walked down my street after my run, I was in awe at its beauty. I am so lucky to be able to enjoy God’s creations!

The Day

For many years, August 30 has held the worst memory of my life. In 1996, my mom and brother were killed when my mom’s roommate fell asleep at the wheel. Each year gets easier, but I don’t think I will ever really be “over it.” 

My mom was not perfect, but she loved her kids as much as she could. I like to remember how she took care of me when I was sick, always had her home open to us whenever we wanted to spend the night, and loved puppies and kittens to an insane degree. 

Anthony was the best brother I could have asked for. He was my protector and biggest supporter. He would take me along on adventures every once in a while. He laughed with me and cried with me. 

To my mom and brother: I love you! I know we will be together again someday. I long for your embrace, and miss you more than you know. 

Dating My Husband

When Chad and I started dating, we went out in Tuesdays while the kids were with their dad because that was the only day we had off and I didn’t have to pay a sitter. Within a few months, Chad was laid off from his job and my regular sitter had health problems, so he started wanting the kids while I worked a late training shift at a new job. Then, we got married and jumped into life as a married couple with three kids. At some point, we stopped dating as we struggled to survive paying for daycare and other household bills on $11 an hour each as the child support payments stopped for a few years. We simply stopped making our marriage a priority. 

Within the last few years, we have started to realize that we need to rediscover who we are as a couple. This time we need to figure out who we are separate from the kids. In the meantime, I have become more social and realized that other couples are able to take trips and do other things without their kids. 

In 2020, we started taking trips without the kids. It started as a few trips to the mountains while Sean and Noel were with their dad and Eric got to stay home with the dogs. Since then, we have gone to Mesa Verde, Mount Rushmore, and the Great Sand Dunes. Each trip has been good in a different way. 

Recently, we have established date night again. Once again, we go out on Tuesdays. With Chad’s work schedule, it is the best time for us to go. Most of the time, we play tennis or pickle ball at nearby courts. We have also gone car shopping and out for ice cream. We have a deal that the person who loses the most weight over the past week gets to choose what we do, and it works out for the most part. He is much better at planning dates than I am. (I seriously chose to go fan shopping at Walmart last week.) 

I’m not sure how this will evolve when it starts to get cold, but I am glad that we have set aside time to be with each other on a regular basis. 

My Mentors

I like to surround myself with people who help me be a better person. There are a few people that I admire and want to emulate in one way or another. 

I have a very outgoing friend that includes everyone and helps take me out of my comfort zone. I walk with her once a week when she is not traveling which is completely in my comfort zone, and I appreciate that she accepts this part of me. She also threw a tea party and let me cohost a bit. It was fun to set up and take down, and I actually enjoyed interacting with a larger group of people. She has also invited me on girls’ trips with her friends that I don’t know well. It’s a bit nerve racking for me, but the way she includes everyone makes it more comfortable. I want to be the kind of person that makes people comfortable when they are nervous. 

My former mother in law is someone I wish I was around more often. She and my former father in law are some of the best people I have ever known. She smothered me when I needed it the most. They see the good in everyone. They have been known to invite people to dinners that need support in one way or another. I want to be the kind of person that sees the good in people and is willing to help when needed. 

I have had many people through the years that have provided service to me in one way or another. There was the lady who did my laundry after I had Eric and was struggling to get around. Another took Noel at least once  a week fir the afternoon when I worked the graveyard shift and was told I couldn’t put her in daycare. Then there was a couple that dropped everything when I was in the hospital. I hope I am stepping up like these people at least a bit. 

Of course, I can’t forget my best friends (other than my husband and daughter). One has been my friend longer than anyone outside my family. She supported me through my divorce, encourages me when I need it, and makes time for me when she comes to town. The other stepped up as my mental health declined during the pandemic accepting that what I needed most was human contact. We had lunches in heated tents at restaurants for a few months and continued through the phases of them reopening once a month and continue to make this a priority. I want to be known as the type of friend that prioritizes others’ needs. 

I know I am not perfect, but I also know I am a better person than I was before these people were in my life. I will continue to learn from other people traits that I want to embrace. 

The Sweater

I have been really struggling this week. Part of it is that I am in a bit of a transition period after being released from my calling, but I know I will be glad when my classes start in a few weeks to have more time to devote to those classes. Another part is that someone I love very much has had a hard week (that won’t be discussed on the blog). Then there is the fact that I don’t feel like I really get any alone time to do what I want to do without having to pay attention to someone else. What am I doing about it? I am starting a sweater. 

I just bought the yarn to make this sweater:

Could I BE more excited? It is going to test my skills and teach me knee things. I have never crocheted anything this big, but I am ready. Oh, and I’m sitting in my car to work on it alone for a few hours. 

School Transportation

Taking my daughter to and from school can be a nightmare. It isn’t necessarily driving to and from. It is the actual pick up and drop off. It gets so congested that it is frustrating. 

There are over 1000 students. (I’m guessing between 1500 and 2000 kids.) Until today, there was only one door unlocked for students to enter. The busses drop off there, the students park by there, and all parents dropping off kids. Needless to say, this caused a lot of traffic congestion. They announced that they will be opening one more door for students only that will be locked during school hours with the hope that this will reduce traffic throughout the neighborhood. I hope it does. I drop her off during my work break, and it is taking too much time. 

The Reaction

I finally sent the box with my niece’s purse and hat and my nephew’s candy last weekend. They got it today, and seem happy with their presents. My sister sent me a video and some pictures of Samantha with her special items.  Tommy texted me himself to thank me for the candy. This auntie’s heart was so happy! I love those kids and am sad they are growing up so far away. Hopefully, his hat and her candy are done soon and shipped out before it gets cold. 

Chad’s Ravioli

Chad spoils us with his cooking sometimes. He cooks Sunday dinner almost every week and often goes all out by either finding a recipe online or in one of the cookbooks he has been collecting. His dad was known for cooking really good food before he got sick, and Chad has carried on this legacy. 

This week he made four cheese ravioli with marinara sauce. (He has a ravioli making tool.) We all loved it. Even my most picky child, Sean. The only problem with him making such things is that he probably won’t make it again because he likes to experiment and rarely makes the same thing twice. 

It’s Hot

Remember a few months ago when I was saying that I just couldn’t get warm for some reason? Yep. You guessed it. I am one of those people that just can’t handle extreme weather, and I am now too hot. I have a medical condition that makes it hard for me to cool down when it gets too hot and even harder to warm up when I get too cold. I used to think living in Arizona would be a dram come true, but days like today tell me I would hate it. That’s ok. I actually love living in Colorado. 

The Power of Music

I love music. One song can change the whole atmosphere. It can bring emotions to the surface of any kind: happy, sad, love, etc. It can also bring back memories, good and bad. I have felt this way as long as I can remember even though I am not personally musically talented.

Today, at church, a couple played an arrangement of a hymn that my mom sang when I was little. He played the piano, and she played the cello. It was beautiful, and brought back memories of my mom. I could see her face and feel her around me as the words not spoken or sang at the time danced around in my head. I choked back tears as I listened to this beautiful music and let the memories wash over me. The hymn was I Need Thee Every Hour. It is so powerful and beautiful!

I need thee every hour,

Most gracious Lord.

No tender voice like thine

Can peace afford. 

I need the, oh, I need thee;

Every hour I need thee!

Oh, bless me now my Savior;

I come to thee!

I need thee every hour,

Stay thou nearby. 

Temptations lose their power 

When thou art neigh. 

I need the, oh, I need thee;

Every hour I need thee!

Oh, bless me now my Savior;

I come to thee!

I need thee every hour,

In joy or pain.

Come quickly and abide, 

Or life is vain. 

I need the, oh, I need thee;

Every hour I need thee!

Oh, bless me now my Savior;

I come to thee!

I need the every hour, 

Most holy One. 

Oh, make me thine indeed,

Thou blessed Son!

I need the, oh, I need thee;

Every hour I need thee!

Oh, bless me now my Savior;

I come to thee!

Know Your Sources

There have been several times this week when I have seen people believe something posted on Facebook that is obviously false. It seems that if someone sees something that aligns with their political or religious views, they just believe it. It doesn’t seem to mater which direction they lean, they just want to believe something that backs them up.

What was the craziest this I saw this week? Someone said that the attempted land grab in Maui is a conspiracy to create an AI government. I knew this was wrong as soon as I saw it. I did a quick Google search to find out what the government in Hawaii is doing about this problem. One of the first things I found was an article from the Associated Press saying that the governor is trying to halt the sale of land for now in an attempt to prevent developers from taking advantage of the native Hawaiians. 

I know it is a lot easier to believe something that boosts your beliefs, but spreading information without verification can be dangerous. It doesn’t take much time to check sources. 

Time Passing Fast

Time is passing by too fast lately. I feel like the summer was gone in a flash. I still have a few more weeks until I start classes again, but Noel going back basically ended our summer. 

I wanted Noel and Sean to have their licenses by the time she went back to school, but I procrastinated it too long and now have to use my breaks to take her to school. They both need to be able to drive independently for different reasons. At this point, I am the one holding them

back. 

They each have appointments on Monday for their drive tests. I will have to rearrange my schedule to take them because I have to take Noel since she is under 18. There isn’t usually a problem with my boss when I have to take an hour or two off in the middle of the day as long as I still work 8 hours a day.

Now, I just need to schedule senior pictures for Noel. Honestly, it’s hard to believe we are already at this point with her sometimes. Seriously, where did the time go?

Watching “Blossom”

Photo Credit: TV Guide

I started watching Blossom on Hulu yesterday. I loved this show when I was a kid, and felt like watching something nostalgic while I worked. 

This first episode hit a bit close to home for me. In this episode, Blossom gets her first period but doesn’t know who to ask advice from because her mother is pursuing a music career in Europe. When I had mine for the first time, my mom was physically there but not mentally. She was in her bed with the room as dark as possible sleeping in a deep depression. My dad had to help me. When my sister got hers for the first time, my mom didn’t live with us. My sister called her, and she asked me to help instead of coming over. Throughout our teenage years, we had to ask our dad for supplies which got easier as we got older but was never completely comfortable. 

I haven’t gotten to any others that bring up any emotions. I am actually enjoying the simplicity of the show. It brings back fun memories and makes me laugh. I will get though the whole series quickly, but I will enjoy it while it lasts. 

Back to School

 Noel recently started her senior year of high school. Dropping her off on the first day was a bit emotional. I felt nostalgic and a bit emotional when the boys entered their senior year, but it was nothing like this. She is my baby, the last one to hit this milestone. Also, she did online school last year, so the house feels a bit empty without her during the day. Adding to that, she is going to a new school.

I know she will do well this year. She is ready for this. I hope to be able to pack in some good memories before she finishes high school. 

I Hope Not

Chad and Noel have been sick for a bit. Chad tested positive for COVID last week. Noel was tested for COVID, the flu, and strep, and they all came back negative. The doctor said that he thought she had COVID but it was too early to get a test. She didn’t want to go through the process of being tested agin, and I don’t blame her. Noel was given an inhaler and a low dose steroid to help her breathe. Chad decided he would tough it out. They both have had less energy and some discomfort. 

Today, I am starting to feel sick. I am hoping it is just a cold. I hate being sick. It could be a stress response. I can deal with stress better than what I have witnessed them going through. 

The Bug

I found this bug on the wall a few nights ago. I’m not sure what it is or where it cam from, but it is so pretty. Sometimes, I am awed by the beauty that comes from unlikely sources. It is more proof of the greatness of God. 

Middle Child’s Day

 

Today is Middle Child’s Day. It doesn’t really mean much to most people, but I like to point it out each year because I was the middle child and still am in some aspects. My Sean is also the middle child. That means we got to have some time just the two of us tonight which we don’t have very often. (That may change depending on Noel’s school schedule.) Our chosen a activity was watching Haunted Mansion. I thought it was a bit scary, and Sean enjoyed my pain. It was fun to spend time together. Hopefully, another movie we are both interested in comes out again soon. 

My Morning

 I’m going to start off by pointing out that we have one working car for our family. Since Chad has a work truck for only work purposes, we have been able to get by with only a few inconveniences for most of our marriage. The exception is times like this. 

Have we tried to get another car? Yes. Chad’s moms got him a 2005 Civic in 2018 that we had for almost two years before it died. Then, we bought a Yukon in 2021, but it has not ran right for more than a week at a time and the mechanics at the dealership can’t figure out what is wrong. We have horrible luck with cars. 

That brings me to today. I was on my way to a 5K this morning, and the tie rod broke as I was leaving the neighborhood. The rest of the day has been filled with finding a tow truck, calling a mechanic, and setting up a rental car. It has been a nightmare of a morning. I just hope the repair isn’t too pricey.

I think Chad and I will be doing Door Dash again so we can get another car.

Samantha’s Hat

 

I made my niece, Samantha, a hat that matches the purse I made her in June. I love the way it turned out! I feel like it is the perfect hat for this little girl. I used some of the left over yarn from the purse and a free pattern from Ravelry. I was honestly loving the pattern and may consider making one again. I just have to find the right person.

Learning to Tat

As of Sunday, I am no longer working with the youth at church. For the most part, I have been happy about this change. I have time when I am upset about it, but I am getting used to the idea…I think. 

Today, I had to figure out what to do with myself while Noel was gone and Chad and Sean watched their show together. I decided that I would finally sit down and learn tatting. I tried last week and realized I needed to watch the DVD to understand it better. Tonight was my chance to do that alone. 

It was actually nice to just sit in my room alone as I learned something new. It has been a long time since I have been able to do this, and I know the time will be consumed with schoolwork next month. I am happy to say that after rewinding the video five times and continuing to practice for another hour, I successfully figured out the basic stitch and made this:

It isn’t much, but it’s a start. Yay me!

Back to School Shopping

Noel is starting school Thursday, so today we did our back to school shopping. Knowing this is probably the last time we do this is bittersweet. On one hand, I hate back to school shopping. On the other hand, I’m not sure I’m ready for her to be grownup. Either way, I soaked it up today through four stores in two hours. 

We went to Target first thinking we would be able to find the supplies she wanted. We did not. They didn’t have much of anything left. We got a bit of make up and decided we would have better luck at Office Depot. 

On our way to Office Depot, we stopped at Kohl’s hoping they would have clothes that she liked and would fit. (She is quite small and has a hard time finding things her size.) Thankfully, she found a great first day outfit and a backpack. 

Our next stop was Office Depot. After some searching, she found the pencils she likes, a notebook, and a multi subject folder. We decided that if she needed anything else we would find it after she gets whatever lists from whatever teachers. 

As we started to leave the shopping center, I asked if she needed new shoes knowing full well that she has shoes. She has been talking about wanting a new pair for school for a couple of weeks. I basically talked her into going to Famous Footwear (it wasn’t hard). She picked out some shoes that go great with the outfit, and I was happy that they gave her a bit more confidence for her first day at a new school. 

I know we will have to go back to Office Depot Thursday or Friday, but I’m glad we were able to find what she needs for now. I hope this helps ease the nerves of going back to school for her senior year. 

Progress Not Perfection

 I still have a long way to go before Chad and I run a marathon, but I’m getting better. I have changed my intervals to 35 seconds running and 40 seconds walking. It is still a bit of a challenge but not so much that I am hating it. I really want to get back to walking the intros to songs and running during the feast of them. I loved running when I was doing it that way. I’m sure I will get there soon. Until then, I’m just going to enjoy getting into shape while remembering the goal of running a marathon the year Chad turns 50 (it’s coming up way too fast).

Great Sand Dunes National Park

For the past few years, Chad and I have taken have taken trips just the two of us. In 2021, we went to Mesa Verde National Park while Sean and Noel were at their dad’s house, and we paid Eric to take care of the dogs and taxi Noel to and from band camp. Last year, we went to South Dakota to see Mount Rushmore (my favorite so far) as Sean stayed home with the dogs and Noel was with her dad again. This year, we headed down to The Great Sand Dunes leaving Sean with the dogs while Noel was gone again. I like that we are getting to know each other without the kids since they have been always been a factor in our relationship and are turning into adults before our eyes. 

We have been talking about seeing the sand dunes for a couple of years, and we finally were able to book a one night camping trip this year. We were lucky to get the spot because they fill up fast. We actually had to book it six months in advance. 

When we got there, we set up our campsite and relaxed for a bit. There was a moment when Chad was exploring before other people got there that there was such peace that I was able to just let the stillness wash over me as the only sounds around me were the squeaks of the chipmunks. I needed that so bad and didn’t even realize it until I was there. When Chad got back, I took a few pictures before we set on our way to the dunes. 

The dunes were bigger than I had imagined. The highest one was over 600 feet according to the information in the visitor center. We climbed the smallest one, and it was exhausting and amazing all at once. The sand was the finest sand I have ever seen which meant we sunk a bit with each step making each step harder than a typical hike. Once we reached the top, we sat down and let the wind wash over us. I took joy in seeing the footsteps of others blow away quickly. We stayed there talking and taking pictures until the wind gusts got a bit too strong then hiked back down. At this point, we realized that there wasn’t much more to do. 

Later that night, we went to the amphitheater where Ranger Patrick did a show about the stars and dunes on other planets. I didn’t know there were dunes elsewhere, but the pictures from NASA were real. At the end, the ranger turned off all lights and showed us constellations. It was so dark that we could see more than I have ever remember seeing. I think it was the first time I saw the Milky Way. I was also able to take the clearest night sky picture I have been able to take with my phone. This presentation made the entire trip worth it. 

The Clouds

You gotta love monsoon season in Colorado. We spend a good part of the day with sunny skies. Then, the clouds rolls in bringing a quick rain shower in the afternoon or evening. 

Today, I ran to the grocery store after work. When I walked out I saw this in front of me and took a picture to send my sister who likes interesting weather pictures. 

As I put the groceries in the car and looked up in the opposite direction, I saw blue skies. 

It is always funny to me when the weather looks one way in one direction and very different the other way. It is one more reason I love living here. 

She Called

Noel and I have an interesting relationship. We are closer than I could have imagined we could be at this age. (I had a strained relationship with my mom for most of my teen years. When it was finally getting better, she died.) There are times when we drive each other crazy, but we still love each other and have fun most of the time.  She has a hard time when I am gone, and I have a hard time when she’s gone. 

This week, she is at a conference all week. I know it is a good experience for her, but it has been hard to have her gone so long and not hear from her. I understand that she is busy and making new friends, and I hope she comes home with great stories. 

Today, I had some good news for her. She got into the school we were hoping she would. (We had to open enroll her from out of district, so nothing was guaranteed.) I texted her to let her know and got an immediate excited text back. Then, she called me tonight to tell me about her day. After having a bit of a bad day today, I was so happy to hear her voice no matter the reason she called. 

As I have said many times, I love my kids more than anything in the world. Being separated from Eric is so hard, but I am proud of the man he has become. When the other kids leave for even a short time, I can feel their absence. I love when they call or text me just to say they miss me. 

Changes

I have another 5K coming up on August 12, and I am getting excited and loving how my increased activity has been affecting my body. It’s not just the obvious benefits. I have noticed that even the small things are getting easier. I am so glad that I have been signing up for eaves again to motivate me to keep going. 

Last summer, I was in pain almost every time I tried to exercise. It made the idea of exercising make me want to curl up in a ball. I kept trying. Each time felt a bit better, and I had the desire to workout. It just wasn’t enough to keep me going on a regular basis. 

This past spring I started taking walks with a friend once a week. It was a great start to increasing my activity level. Having someone to meet up with gave me a reason to get out and some accountability. I’m sure this friend doesn’t know how much I like our walks that give me some human interaction outside my house on a regular basis as well as a reason to move. 

As I find more ways to keep moving, I am reminded of how I felt in 2019 and 2020 when I was running regularly. I can’t wait until I get back to the level I was then.